Affirmations and Their Anxiety-Reducing Effects

Many different tools exist to help one reduce his or her anxiety level, and here is yet another such tool: affirmations. Anxiety-sufferers are way too hard on themselves, but many do not understand what being "too hard on one's self" means. What types of thoughts are going through the heads of people who are too hard on themselves, as compared to those who are not too hard on themselves?

The following paragraph will take a look at an example of such a person who is too hard on him or herself and compare that to a person who is more realistic and sensible. The person who is too hard on him or herself remembers almost every last thing that he or she believes that he or she has done wrong. This person may say something in public that strikes others as weird, and these people will give that person a funny look. This person in turn begins to think, even obsess, about how "stupid" that comment was. It may bother the person several days afterward, and each time he or she thinks of this incident, he or she will blame him or herself for saying that "stupid" thing. An incident perceived as being more major to the person in question can have longer-lasting effects. Say the person misbehaved as a teenager at a family gathering, saying something rude and off-color that bothered almost everyone. This person may remember this incident for years, even decades, and may still call him or herself an "idiot" for doing something so "stupid." Any anxiety-sufferer, including the socially anxious person, can list many of these incidents.

Now, take a look at the more realistic and sensible person. If this person made a seemingly stupid comment in public and people looked at him or her in a funny manner, he or she would rationalize this situation by saying, "I am not sure what those people were bothered by; I made a rather benign comment," or, "Everyone says things that seem silly to others, and it's okay for me to say things like that too." In the second scenario, the more realistic person would say, "I did some silly things as a teenager and I learned a lot from them," or, "I did say something rude at a family gathering as a teenager, and it's funny when I think about it now." In short, the person has dealt with it in an effective manner because he or she is not emotionally blaming him or herself for perceived failure and "stupidity." The situation is over with and done, and now that person can move on in life.

Next, take a look at affirmations. What are affirmations? Affirmations are positive statements one makes about him or her self. The anxiety sufferer in the first case, and all of the anxious in general, spend most of their emotional time in their head thinking about how stupid, worthless, and awful they are. This leads to many devastating psychological effects such as severe anxiety, depression, and in an extreme case, suicide.

Affirmations are very difficult to use at first, but used often and used right, they can be a powerful tool for changing a person's thinking from that of self-blame to that of self-love. Loving one's self is okay and is different than narcissism. There is an appropriate amount of self-love that all people need to have in order to be happy. A good way of doing affirmations is to look in the mirror each morning, and think of five to ten positive things to say about one's self while looking at one's self in the mirror.

This is very difficult to do for those who have moderate and severe anxiety, but doing new things is always difficult. So, a person will look in the mirror, no matter how tough it may be, and say, "I am a good writer," or, "I have a great smile," or, "I have a great ability to listen to others."

Some of the severely anxious may have such a hard time with this that it may be necessary for them to ask friends or family for positive feedback. This is perfectly okay to do. The other point to keep in mind is that it is important to praise everything that is good, no matter how small.

Over time, this will slowly change one's thinking and help him or her to realize all the positive assets he or she has. The internal dialogue of a person will slowly change as he or she realizes that he or she is not all the horrible things that he or she once believed him or her self to be. While everyone has their errors, everyone also has their positive qualities, and this is exactly the point of making positive affirmations.

This is a very useful tool for every anxiety sufferer, and it is strongly recommended for everyone to use, no matter how relaxed or anxious he or she is!