Alcohol the Beginning Part 4

"How about I challenge you to a game of pinball", I asked Tommy, while casually lighting a cigarette, "I'll even let you choose your favorite table".

"Your on!" he quickly answered, "but the loser has to pay for the games".
"No problem my man", I said while following him out into the mall, "as long as you don't mind losing".

Tommy and I led the way with the rest of the group trailing close behind. There was one girl present by the name of Kim, a real stunner who Tommy had grown up with while close neighbors. I had often seen her around school but never found a good reason to start up a conversation. The rumor was that she had been going out with a 20-year-old biker, and that she was not very interested in dating any one in high school.

Once we reached the 'Game Room', Tommy stopped and introduced me to the person in charge of the arcade. This strange little employee, looking to be in his early forties, appeared slightly stoned while supporting himself up against the change machine. He had long strands of greasy brown hair sprouting from a nearly bald head. Not the type of person one would expect to be supervising a place full of teenagers, never the less, there he was. As he shook my hand, I almost had to laugh at the way he used our slang way of speaking to bring himself across as younger. This guy's act is worse then mine, I thought, quickly pulling back my hand, what a strange bit of work this is.

When I turned around, I discovered that Tommy had vanished.

"OVER HERE!" his voice shouted from a doorway at the far end of the room," Come on in, I want to show you something".

As Tommy disappeared into the back room of the arcade, I left the company of that strange little gatekeeper, and walked over to join my old friend. Noisy pinball machines lined every wall of the arcade, and not one of them was standing idle.

"Would you close the door behind you", Tommy asked, as I entered what looked like the machine repair shop," I just though we could have a couple of beers before we play".

My eyes nearly popped out of their sockets as I watched him pull out a six-pack from a cooler behind his chair.

"Now that's an offer I just can't refuse", I said, anxious to join him at a small table, "Where did you get it from?"

In his explaination, Tommy told me of a tavern, located only a few blocks down the road, which was not too concerned about selling beer to minors. It seemed to be well suited to his needs, and not unlike the arcade, was both warm and convenient. According to him, the old hippy did not have any objections to us using this back room as long as we kept our hands off his equipment.

As we sat drinking our beer and relating stories of the previous summer, Tommy and I somehow forgot all about pinball and completely lost tack of time. Alcohol always did have this unique way of tunneling my attention. It was as though the past and the future were detached from my thoughts. All that was there for me to grab hold of was the moment I was in, and the beer in my hand. Even the fact that I was getting drunk did not occure to me. Unlike those very first times when I tried alcohol, times when remarkable anxiety and anticipation stirred excitement for what was to come, I now drank with little thought. The realization that I had already emptied three cans of beer surprised me, but more importantly, I wanted more.

"It's about time you two finished up in here, I"ll be locking the arcade in about five minutes".
Where did he come from? I thought, turning to see the old man standing at the door.

After finishing what remained in our cans, Tommy and I departed through the now emptied games room and headed off in different directions. We had agreed to meet again in the mall on the following evening to carry on were we had left off. If it were up to me, I would have liked to continue drinking right there and then, but it was getting late.

As I left the mall and started the long cold walk back home, all I could think about was drinking again the following day. Experience had showed me how to appreciate what a few beers had to offer. By succumbing to its wonderful influence, I would be able to quench all my insecurities and attain a much stronger, more confident state of mind. Alcohol was becoming a hero in my life, and nothing human or animal could ever take the place of this extraordinary friendship.

The following day of boring classes only served to aggravate my already heightened state of impatience. School was just getting in the way of what I wanted to do, surrounding me with the kind of people that just did not share in my way of thinking.

Hour after hour dragged by while I sat longing for what waited for me at the bottom of a beer can. That wonderful state of euphoria was so intense, yet so easy and rewarding to achieve. Nothing could compare to the feeling alcohol released once it entered into my body. Regardless of what kind of a day I might have had, or how awful I felt, with just a few swallows of beer, the world transformed from a cage of limitations into my very own playground. How my parents could drink so much and become, instead, miserable was beyond me. There definetly had to be something wrong with them.

Hangovers were another thing that I did not quite understand. During the past summer, a few of our group complained about feeling almost incapacitated after a night of drinking. Although I always woke up the next day feeling very thirsty, I never once came close to suffering from anything worse. Maybe it was because they sometimes mixed in a few shots of whiskey between beers. Whatever the reason, I figured they should take a leaf out of my book and stick to a few cans of beer a night.

In hindsight, it was unfortunate that I could not see the dangers of my misguided loyalty. Without the proper guidance to warn me, I came to believe every word of what I told myself about drinking. Alcohol was quickly indoctrinating me to its distorted way of thinking. These impregnating thoughts created a full proof instrument for alcohol's control and eventually it's desired state of dominance. The demon was entering my mind, and I didn't even know it.

With every beer drunk, I mistakenly accepted the resulting confidence and strengths as my own. However, these were the personal attributes of a demon, which in time would snatch them from my grasp, and send me into a downward spiral of anxious depression. The truth remained hidden behind layer upon layer of mental illusion. Alcohol's plan was simple but ingenious. First, it would delude me with the pleasures of my desires, but once it got a firm grip on my mind, alcohol would claim my life as its own. The consequences of reaching that point are deadly. In alcohol's way of thinking, human life is disposable,and there was always another young body waiting to be infected.

It felt like the evening was never going to arrive, but at last it did, and I once again found myself entering into the warmth of the mall. As I approached the café where I expected to find Tommy and the others, I began to wander if we might find a better place to do some drinking. I was more accustomed to enjoying that pleasure in a less confined space, and hoped we would not be spending our entire Friday night inside that small room.

When I didn't see Tommy in the café, I decided to look for him in the arcade. Again, there was no sign of my friend, which seemed odd because I knew we were both looking forward to downing a few beers. Puzzled, I re-checked the time, and then walked over to where the old maintenance man was standing.
"Have you seen Tommy?" I asked," He's supposed to meet me here tonight".

"No, not yet", he answered, while leaning up against one of the machines, "but I did see a few of his friends in here earlier".

"Thanks anyway", I said, and turned to leave, "If you see Tommy before I do, tell him that I'm still looking for a party".

"Hold on a minute", his voice now near a whisper, "If it's a score you need, I think I can put a good bag of weed your way".

"No thanks", I replied in surprise, "I've got everything I need in a six-pack of beer, but I'll keep it in mind".

As I re-entered the mall, I wandered why he would ask me something like that. Did having long hair and wearing torn jeans give the wrong impression of me? I guess it must have, or why else would he have offered to sell me drugs. During the summer, I had seen a lot of kid's smoking weed down at the lakefront. I even tried it myself, but it only managed to increase my anxiety so I never did it again. Beer was all I needed to have a good time, and as long as I had a few of those, I didn't really care what the others were doing.

Halfway up the mall, I heard someone shout my name and turned to see who it was. There was Tommy, rushing towards me with a big smile across his face.

Sorry I'm late", he said, slightly out of breath, "Three of my friends just moved into an apartment on the east side, and we are trying to arrange a big party for tonight. Do you want to come?"

"That sounds fantastic!" I answered with excitement, "Are there going to be plenty of girls there?"

"That's one of the reasons I'm here now!" he laughed, "The mall is always full of girls who are looking for a party".

Before starting our search, Tommy suggested that we down a couple of cold beers in the arcade room to put us in the right mood. Just the mention of the word `beer` put me in a more relaxed state -of -mind, and I was quickly off, leading the way down the mall.

We had no hassles from the old hippy, as he stood again, half-stoned and in no way concerned with what was going on around him. How anyone could put this guy in charge was beyond me, I thought, closing the door of the back room behind us, but I am sure glad someone did.

"We will have to down these in a hurry," Tommy said, handing me a precious can from his coat pocket, "Our ride will be here to take us to the party in about half an hour".

I took my friends advice, and drank as fast as I could, without spilling a single drop of the golden liquid. Anticipation traveled within the stream of alcohol, both ingredients rushing to my brain, resulting in a climax of excitement. There was only one problem, how was I going to get past the curfew Mom had set for me?

Tommy was wiping some beer from his chin when a wicked smile came across his face.

"We can crash there tonight", he said, while throwing his empty can into the trash, "So if we get ourselves a couple of girls to spend the night with us, then it's Party,Party,Party!"

"So what are we waiting for?" I answered, heading for the door, "let's get out there and find us some pussy!"

As we left the games room and made our way down the mall, a phone hanging on an adjacent wall reminded me of what I needed to do. I wasn't sure of what I was going to tell her, but not calling Mom would only create a hell for me once I did get back home.

"I'll only be a minute", I said, motioning Tommy to carry on looking without me, "Just have to make a quick call".

My fingers were shaking a bit as I nervously picked up the receiver and dialed our number. I could not be sure if she was going to be in a good mood or not, either way, I was not going to miss this party.

"Hello Mom", I said, forcing my voice into a state of calmness. "A friend of mine invited me to spend the night at his place. Both parents said it would be all right, we were just about to order a pizza and then listen to some music. I will be home some time tommow afternoon ok?"

A few moments of uncomfortable silence followed my question before Mom finally replied. In her voice, I could hear the sobriety I had hoped for, and she agreed to my plans without an argument.

A wave of relief and freedom rolled over me as I hung up the phone and turned to greet my evening. I felt that tonight I could do anything I wanted, including getting wasted at the party house. I couldn't wait to get my hands on that next cold can of beer.

A short way up the mall I could see Tommy walking towards me with six nice looking girls at his side. This night was getting better and better, and I quickened my pace to get a closer look.

"Not bad for only five minutes huh?" Tommy laughed, and then ushered me away for a private word, "Do you see anything you like?"

This was just too much to ask for, another `dream come true`. I did see someone that I had an immediate attraction too, and was quick to point her out to my new best friend.

"I'll take the girl wearing the black fur coat", I said, making eye contact with her, "You don't mind do you?"

"She's all yours my man", Tommy answered, feeling quite pleased with himelf, "Her name is Joy and they are all coming with us to the party"