Ambivalence Explored in "Into the Wild"

It is commonly said, "It takes one to know one." Jon Krakauer, in his novel "Into the Wild," accurately describes the main character Chris McCandless because he, like McCandless, embarked on his own adventure into the wild. Describing the landscape, his confidence, and his father, Krakauer uses language that reflects an ambivalent attitude towards his journey.

Describing the landscape as both beautiful and terrifying, Krakauer reveals his ambivalence towards his journey. At first, Krakauer notes the "obscure spires" that are "steep and frightening" (134). In contrast, later descriptions yield that the "summit is surreal" (153). Describing the mountain as both beautiful and terrifying, Krakauer exposes his contradicting viewpoint. This fact is further exemplified through the contradicting statements, "bigger and infinitely more menacing" and "a peak of immense and spectacular proportions" (138, 134). Though both used to describe the mountain, "spectacular" implies inspiring whereas "menacing" implies danger. Although the mountain is fraught with danger, it "holds an almost pornographic fascination for [him]" (135). This attraction contrasts his later description of the mountain as "particularly sinister" (135). The feeling of attraction and repulsion are both present and create his ambivalent attitude. The purpose of such paradoxes is to create a sense of inner conflict, which translates to his attitude towards his journey. Along with descriptions of the landscape, Krakauer's confidence and weakness during the climb also reveal his ambivalence towards the journey. The confidence and weakness expressed by Krakauer throughout his venture also demonstrates his ambivalence. During the ascent, he remembers that he "is truly afraid" and often "exhausted and crazed with fear" (139, 136). However he also says, "the higher [he climbs] the more comfortable [he] became" (142). Fear begets panic so the fact that Krakauer recalls becoming more confident as he scales the mountain is a paradox. The feelings of fear and confidence during the climb are directly related. In addition, "[Krakauer] feels abandoned, vulnerable,

Krakauer's varying attitude toward his father belies his ambivalent attitude towards his own trek into the wilderness. He defends his father as "a kind and generous man," yet at once calls his father "a volatile, extremely complicated person, possessing of a brash demeanor that masked deep insecurities." Proof of his father's generosity lies in "the expensive shelter" that Krakauer has been lent (147). Krakauer also seems to resent his father deeply. He recalls how it is "beyond [his] power to forgive" his father and how he "has a knack for living up to the old man's worst expectations" (147). The conflicting feelings that Krakauer relates about his father translate to the ambivalence shown throughout his climb. The respect and lack thereof also display his view of his adventure. He looks up to his father and recognizes him as being "[the one] who taught [him] to climb" (147). Despite this, Krakauer "feels oppressed by the old man's expectations" (148). He does not show any respect for his father's wishes but respects him as the one who fostered his passion for mountain climbing. The attitude of the journey becomes ambivalent because it is his father who is the chief sponsor and yet, he does not have much respect for him.

Krakauer attempts to undergo a life-changing experience through his trek into the wilderness. However, he fails to gain it and returns to his previous lifestyle. The ambivalence developed by his description of the wilderness, his feelings of confidence and weakness, and his attitude towards his father are a mirror to the ambivalence seen in his own adventure. The uncertainty that is spawned from his ambivalence deters any chance at "[fixing] all that was wrong with [his] life" and "in the end," the climb "changed almost nothing" (155).