American Idol Bails on Bikini Boy

"Bikini Boy" will no doubt prevail in Idol chat across the nation Wednesday. Though, truth be told, it seemed like the biggest staged stunt in Idol history yet. Two minutes till the show ended, a young male adult emerged in a skimpy bikini, which most Americans saw fuzzed out in every commercial for the past week.

Surely, some were relieved Idol didn't allow nudity to reign, and the surprise of the bikini, spoofing on last seasons "Bikini Girl" was a humorous one. Still, two seconds in front of the judges is the only air time he got as Simon led the parade out of the room leaving bare Bikini Boy standing alone wondering if that was a "No" for Hollywood. "No" indeed for him, but "No" was not the theme this Tuesday in Denver.

In fact, of the 10 contestants who got more than 30 seconds of play in the Primetime hour, 7 got a "Yes" and most of those Yes's were won by all 4 judges. But that didn't stop the humorous commentary.

After a strong yes for a sexy Kim, Simon questioned whether or not she was wearing a wig. It did look like a wig (and strangely she sang a personal tune about hair growth). Then there was Casey, who was encouraged to let his pony-tail down...and take off his shirt by the lady judges. He got a "yes," but Randy suggested he "Find some persona pills." Lastly, Simon called a crying Danielle "Broken" and said she needed to be rescued from Corporate Hell. But even she got a Yes.

For the record, Posh Spice was back as a guest judge and looked fantastic Day 1; fake eyelashes and all. Day 2, however, she looked more like a darker version of Tinkerbelle with a really high, tight ponytail - quite distracting. Still, America likely loved her more this episode than ever as she embraced a young child. Oh yes, there was a child that got thematic floor time this week, too. But her sincerity prevailed.

This episode lacked the deep tear jerking stories that have swept across America this season. It was almost refreshing not to be so emotionally sucked in. Idol has had so much drama since it hit the road, so many deep dives into heartache, personal tragedy, loss and people with a cause. Honestly, it has made everyone wonder if you have to be a narcoleptic, amputee with both parents in the military just to get to Hollywood. But, Bikini Boy was a great summary of the lightest weight, old school episode of Season 9.

And for the record, fellow Americans; we were exposed to approximately 47 commercials/advertisements in all of this mess. But it's Idol! Who really cares? And let's not forget, next week...we are ALL going to Hollywood, even Ellen!