An Online Romance

If you begin an online romance, be careful - because what you find may be the nut next door.
**********

May 21 2008
From: marys@mytime.net
To: Boblink@castsel.com
Subject: Hi

Dear Bob

Thank you so much for the photograph of yourself. You are even kinda cute. I enjoyed talking to you in chat this evening. Enclosed find a photograph of myself. Hope it meets with your approval.

Mary
______________________________

May 21 2008
From: Boblink@castsel.com
To: marys@mytime.net
Subject: Re: Hi

Dear Mary

You are kinda cute yourself. I enjoyed our discussion too. Hope we can do it again sometime.

Bob
Ps. Btw, are you married?
______________________________

May 21 2008
From: marys@mytime.net
To: Boblink@castsel.com
Subject: Married?
Dear Bob

Why do you want to know if I am married? Are you?

Mary
______________________________

May 22 2008
From: Boblink@castsel.com
To: marys@mytime.net
Subject: Re: Married?

Dear Mary

No, I am not married, have never been married, but would like to be someday. I just did not want to tread on anyone's toes if you were taken.

Humblely yours,

Bob
______________________________

May 22 2008
From: marys@mytime.net
To: Boblink@castsel.com
Subject: Re: Married?

Dear Bob

How sweet. No, I am not married, but I was at one time. Divorce happens, ya'know?

Hugs

Mary
______________________________

May 23 2008
From: Boblink@castsel.com
To: marys@mytime.net
Subject: A Personal Question

Dear Mary

I hope you don't mind if I ask for your phone number. I would love to talk to you sometime if that would be ok. My number is 555-555-5550.

Just asking

Bob
______________________________

May 23 2008
From: marys@mytime.net
To: Boblink@castsel.com
Subject: Re: A Personal Question

Dear Bob

It was so nice to hear your voice this evening. Who would have known we both have an interest in collecting rocks! That was so exciting to hear. You may call me anytime you wish. XXXOOOXXX

Big hugs

Mary
______________________________

May 24 2008
From: Boblink@castsel.com
To: marys@mytime.net
Subject: A surprise!

Dear Mary

I sent you a package at the address you gave me. I hope you will enjoy the object that is enclosed. I picked it out special just for you. XXXOOOXXX

With all my heart

Bob
______________________________

May 27 2008
From: marys@mytime.net
To: Boblink@castsel.com
Subject: Re: A surprise! - What is this??

Bob

What exactly was that thing?? Was it supposed to be a ....you know! What kind of person do you think I am to believe that would be an appropriate gift. Are you some kind of pervert?

Disgusted

Mary
______________________________

May 27 2008
From: Boblink@castsel.com
To: marys@mytime.net
Subject: Re: A surprise! - What is this??

Mary

You said you would like to have something that was special to me. That object was very special because it is almost exactly what I have for real. If you wish, you can send it back. I didn't realize you were such a prude!

Bob
Ps - I will keep myself to myself from now on, you witch.
______________________________

May 28 2008
From: marys@mytime.net
To: Boblink@castsel.com
Subject: PERVERT!!

Bob, you are indeed a pervert and don't call my number again. Fifteen calls in one hour is a bit much, don't you think??? If I want to talk to you, I will call YOU. So leave me alone.

Mary
______________________________

May 28 2008
From: marys@mytime.net
To: Boblink@castsel.com
Subject: Re: PERVERT!

Hey Miss Bitchiness!

You were the one who was looking for love and I guess you found it, right inside yourself. You don't need a man (OR MY ROCK, SO SEND IT BACK) and I no longer have any interest in you. Please do not text me anymore and I won't call you.

Bob (the pervert)
______________________________

May 29 2008
From: marys@mytime.net
To: Boblink@castsel.com
Subject: IT'S OVER!!

To the Idiot Who Annoys Me

I hope you received your THING, even though it is now more akin to sand in an hourglass and guess what?? YOUR TIME IS UP! Perv!!

That's QUEEN Bitch to you!
PS - I changed my phone number, you perverted loser!