An Overview of Abusive Relationships

For most women who have been in an abusive relationship, they always have one thing in common and that is; mental scars. Why would a man want to physically and mentally abuse his woman? And why on earth would a woman sit back and allow some brute to walk all over her?

There are many women who have suffered abusive relationships and choose not to report their abusers to the appropriate authorities. In some parts of the world men are encouraged to "beat" a stubborn woman in order to put her in her place.

There are instances where women endure abusive relationships because they have no where else to go and no one to turn to. Some women put up with it because of financial rewards.

There are times when some men turn their women into punching bags because they want to prove to themselves and everyone else that they are in charge. If that is not the height of stupidity, I really do not know what is!

A woman in her right senses would not agree to have a relationship with someone who would beat her up at the slightest provocation, now would she? The answer should be a big fat NO! Most of these men usually come to woo the woman in a gentlest, impressive, and often respectful manner. What turns a man into a monster as soon as he knows that the lady is totally committed to him?

Here are a few reasons some people believe violent men lash out at their woman:

The feeling of control. Most violent men feel the need to use violence as a means to control everything and everyone around them (that includes their woman).

Insecurity is also one of the reasons why some men become abusive.

The need to prove their manhood to family and friends (this is a common act among Africans), the only time you play with your woman is when you want to have sex with her, any man who over indulges his wife with his fun side is considered a weakling.

Some women would rather stay in a marriage or relationship that is unhealthy because they would rather be in an abusive relationship than stay alone without a man in their (pitiful) lives. Some women know straight off the bat that their men have violent streaks, they say to themselves "to hell with it! I'll be damned if my niece gets married before me!"

This is a true story:

A woman who lived somewhere in West Africa was in a relationship with a very handsome young man she met at a friend's wedding. He asked her out a couple of times and everyone in the family knew them as an item. He slapped her one evening when she got home late from work and demanded that she tell him where she was all night because he was just coming from her office and was told that she had left hours before. She was shocked and asked him to leave; he begged her and promised that he would never hit her again for as long as he lived. She believed him and took him back, he lived up to his promise, he never hit her again, he shot her to death!

People will treat you with respect only if you treat yourself with respect. A man, no matter how violent he is will never hit you if he knows that you would bring him down if he does. Do not let family or societal pressures push you into having an unhealthy relationship.