An Unforgettable Day

Planning a wedding can be an arduous task, especially when you are a first time bride. This is primarily because you want everything to be perfect, but also because you have this "idea" or "fantasy" that you would like to fulfill.

Six years ago I was 'that' bride. I planned my wedding because I 'knew' what I wanted and I felt that I could be the only one to fulfill it. More so, I had a budget and it was a great way to save. I did it this way because I knew then, that having a 'good marriage' was more important than having a 'big wedding'.

After becoming engaged, my husband-to-be and I had agreed that we would like to have a garden wedding. The first thing I did was buy an agenda (which I still have today). I decided then that 'the only' assistance I needed came from the library. Therefore I went to the library and took out all the books they had on 'weddings', 'planning an economical wedding' and the like. There was a lot of reading and researching to be done and I was eager to do it. During this process I learned two things fast! The first was that it was difficult to find an inexpensive wedding reception venue, because our wedding month was June, and June tends to be 'the' busiest month for weddings. Secondly, it was extremely difficult to find a reasonably priced wedding dress. However, I was not discouraged, but instead inspired, because this experience allowed me to be more creative than I ever thought I was or could be. Yes, I was a little frustrated now and then, but I did the only thing I thought I could do... I did a lot of foot work and I asked a lot of questions of those who were more experienced than I, which I found to be very helpful.

My wedding day had arrived and it was a disaster! I was up early with the aid of my matron of honor. At first it seemed like everything was going well, however, I then realized that was not the case when I got a call informing me that the wedding cake was not up to par. We paid for a cake that had dirt all over it! I could not believe it! How could they deliver a cake with dirt on the fondue?! I was livid. I asked for it to be returned and redone. Now, while that was being taken care of I received another call informing me that the car that was supposed to be picking me up was taken by someone in the family and no one knew where this person was or how to contact him/her. Then I received a call saying that my mother-in-law-to-be was reluctant to leave the hotel room and had other plans. More importantly, she wanted to order breakfast-in-bed, be pampered all day, and had no interest in attending the wedding. As a direct result of her behavior... my husband-to-be was late for the wedding. To avoid reliving this horrible day, I have to say that it was 'the' worst day of my life! I had put so much into planning this wedding, to have it sabotaged by my husband's family the day of! At least my parents had enough guts to try and sabotage it during the planning of the wedding! To add to it, no one in my husband's family gave monetary of cash gifts! All the gifts received were given to us by "my" natural and extended family. Like they say... "When life gives you lemons, make lemonade!"

The experience opened up my eyes to many things that day. I then realized that I probably had made some decisions that I probably would not be able to live with "until death do us part"! I did not know what to think or do. I had no reference point for an experience like that. Today, I look back and that day is not only a big disappointment but also a big question mark (which I am slowly but surely getting answers to). It was a very strange wedding experience.