An Update on Life in My World

I am writing this to explain my long absence from writing and posting material to Associated Content.

Starting in May, my husband and I both got the flu. At the time, we didn't think much of it. But as the effects started to linger and get worse, we figured, "hmm, we probably had swine flu."

He was sick, or rather, diagnosed, with everything under the sun for the remainder of the summer. Pneumonia, costochondritis, tension headaches, and histoplasmosis are just a few. To top things off, not only was he sick with seemingly continuous and elusive disorders, but in July of 2009, my company assigned me to a project where I'd have to travel. I was expected to be on site at the client office Monday through Friday, then at home over the weekend.

Now, a schedule like that is not the end of the world, but with a sick family member at home, it was even harder to leave than it would have been in the first place. About a week after my initial project ended, I was assigned to another project where I'd have to travel, this time much further away, from Cincinnati to St. Louis.

I'm paraphrasing here, so I'm sure none of this seems like such a big deal offhand. However, with these and many other issues creeping in, we collectively decided most of 2009 was the worst year either of us had ever had. Without the much-welcomed phone calls from family members and impromptu get-togethers with friends, we might have collectively lost it, too.

I tell you this not to make you feel bad or to seem like all I do is feel sorry for myself; quite the contrary, actually. I did spend a lot of time feeling sorry for myself, sometimes wondering if it was ever going to work out, fearing that my husband's life might actually be cut short, and wondering what we'd done that was so bad to deserve to have everything tank on us.

That was very difficult for me, because, no matter how cynical and sarcastic I may be (all in jest), I do tend to be a perpetual optimist. I've always believed everything happens for a reason and it all works out in the end. I hated doubting that those clichéd words I'd probably shoved down others' throats for so many years could actually be untrue. But, some of the time, I just couldn't find the good in things like I'd always been so good at before.

I haven't been posting much, but I've been writing nonstop. For the people on AC whose work I've always followed, you've probably noticed that I haven't been leaving a whole lot of comments. I promise, I've still been reading everyone's work, and there's been a wealth of great work for me to enjoy. I just didn't have the time or energy to leave any sort of thoughtful response.

Well, it's 2010, and I think it's all coming together. After living in Ohio for the past 4 ½ years, my husband and I have decided to move back to our home state of Iowa. He's starting a new job, we're moving close to both of our families, he's getting better, and we were fortunate to make it through the year of 2009 with steady employment and health insurance. As you can see, I've found my inner optimist again. I'm sure it won't be perfect, but I don't have the time or energy to spare worrying so much or fearing the outcome of everything.

Already in 2010, we visited Florida to see my family, and we ventured down to Miami for the Orange Bowl. Our Iowa Hawkeyes came away victorious; it was a blast. We went to Disney World with my parents, and no matter how many times I'm there, I still enjoy every ride and show with the same giddy smile of a five-year-old.

Once we got back, we had to finish packing and loading the rental truck (barf), but we also got to spend one last "happy hour" with our friends in Ohio. One of our friends organized the event, another drove here from out-of-town just for us, and others, like our former neighbors and people we've met along the way, also came to say goodbye.

Today, my husband left with the moving truck with my dog in tow. Back to Iowa, and soon, I will join them. But for now, I will finish throwing things out of the house we rented in Cincinnati, I will write, I will drink red wine, and I will prepare myself to be on the road for work for at least a few more months.

Life really is full of ups and downs, isn't it?

I hope the new year is full of everything you could hope for and more. If you ever need an encouraging word, let me know.