Andale Mexican Restaurant in San Francisco, California: A Restaurant Review

Here's two tips to finding good Mexican food in San Francisco - you won't find it in areas that look like the one Andale is in, and it doesn't cost nearly as much as what Andale charges. When you see either one of these things, it's an indication to look somewhere else.

Andale is a picture-perfect example of basing your pricing on what you calculate the market will bear rather than what the food items are actually worth. In spite of the extremely high prices, the portions are smaller than what you'll get at even the most humble taqueria or taco truck. Not only that, but the meat tastes like generic CostCo stuff grilled up without any particular skill, and the tortillas remind me of the ones from the discount groceries in the Mission.

Breakfast is served on weekends only here and will run you $8 to $10. There's a Breakfast Burrito that comes with chorizo, eggs, refried beans, potatoes and cheese. For nearly nine bucks, you can do better than refried beans, and you can give me a choice of meat. And get some pico de gallo in there, stop trying to make some McDonalds idea of what a breakfast burrito is supposed to be. There's also Huevos Rancheros and Huevos Con Chorizo. The Omelette a la Mexicana consists of three eggs with avocado, cheese and pico de gallo ... but no meat, and for $9.75? You have got to be effing kidding me.

The lunch/dinner menu is the same as any standard taqueria, except they charge roughly two times as much for everything, and don't give you particularly large portions or particularly good quality to make up for it. They're worse than a taqueria in a way, because they don't let you change the beans in whatever you order - every item comes with either refried or pinto beans by default, not a black bean to be found anywhere in the house much less any more exotic variety.

If you plan on drinking to forget how much you are paying for this mediocre food, get ready to pay because margaritas start at $8 for the most basic, and a "top shelf" margarita (made with one year old anijo tequila and cointreau) will set you back at least a little over ten bucks. How about a simple bottle of beer? Domestic is $4.75, import is $5.25. And we're not talking any special brands here. The most graceful and tactful response I can come up with to that pricing is "f- you, no f-ing way."

Andale apparently thinks that by pasting a bunch of "upscale" pretentions over generic CostCo food and generic American diner recipes, they can trick all the dumb rich bridge-and-tunnelers who pass through the Westfield into dropping their ill-gotten coin, either that or this place is a fantastic market for the "businessperson who wants Mexican food but is too uptight, paranoid and/or socially awkward to actually venture into a real taqueria" demographic. For those that know better, don't waste time and money on this bullshit. San Francisco has much better to offer (at much better prices) than this.