Anxiety is Not a Mom's Best Friend

The IT is anxiety. My little friend and antidote to a good night's sleep and fun filled days. IT interrupts my day and wakes me up at night with its insatiable "To Do" list of miscellaneous concerns, shoulds and potential crises.

You forgot to call the vet, need to re-order his migraine prescription, Dad's birthday is coming up - where is that birthday card?, defrost the chicken, finish the press release, why hasn't Richard e-mailed me the pictures?, is my personal account overdrawn? Savannah's concert is when?, What is that horrible smell?, Velvet needs her rabies shot, clean the house, I still need a gift for Mom, pick up the photos, we're out of milk, I still haven't called Roxanne back, shouldn't have to weed -but the yard looks like crap - I'm a renter not an owner, I still need to renew my passport - Scott needs new shoes. Today, after school?

Anxiety is random. Miscellaneous. Mundane. Merciless.

"Generalized Anxiety Disorder," a.k.a incessant worry about everyday everythings, affects four million Americans. This is about 2.8% of the population. And, guess what?! Women are twice as likely to be afflicted than men and most of those women are ... moms. Yep, moms and me.

Generalized anxiety is uncomfortable. It shows up as fatigue, insomnia (love that combination!), headaches, poor concentration, fear, frequent need to pee and constipation. IT make sex a chore, puts butterflies in our stomachs and makes us cranky with the kids. Bleh.

Journal It Away

One way I get IT out is to journal IT down. And down and down and down. These days, most days, I journal 3 pages of IT. I do this in the morning with a little cup of coffee after taking care of them and before beginning the rest of my day. Started a couple weeks ago and ... the more I wrote IT down the less of IT there is!

I feel calmer, I sleep better. Been over a week since IT woke me up in the middle of the night. And instead of 3 pages of IT I find myself writing a page or just half a page. The remaining pages (and I always write 3) are turning into gratitude lists or story ideas and vacation plans, everything but IT.

The Unsent Letter & Unsent E-mail

Another awesome journal technique is the "Unsent Letter." Many of mine were disguised as Dear John - you smuck you - letters. Most were never sent. Thankfully. I know that because I come across them here and there. Unsent letters hide out in unpacked boxes. You'll see.

The Unsent E-mail is trickier. Really, it is too much of a temptation not to push the SEND button. Until they create a retrieve option I highly recommend you shy away from this high tech "Unsent Letter!"

The point of this journaling technique is to provide a safe, private space to vent and vent and vent. And vent somemore. Say absolutely everything that comes to mind. Get all your hurt, anger, resentment, pettiness, ridiculousness, victimness OUT and down.

You'll know when you are done. There will be a feeling of peace, relief and fatigue. You will want to nap. First, rip it up. This really isn't something you will want to unpack someday or have waved in your face by him, her or them. Safety first. Rip it up!

Gratitude ABC's

Finally, somedays the best way for me to get IT out of my head is to replace IT with something better. Gratitude. I start at the beginning of the Alphabet (but you don't have to.) Here, I'll take you through some of my Gratitude ABCs ...

"A" is for Angel my beloved standard poodle who is now, literally, an angeldog.
"B" is for Bobby who will be caring for my home and pets while I'm on vacation.
"C" is for dark chocolate and for whoever invented chocolate in the first place.
"D" is dogs & delicious dinners cooked by my husband like last night's spaghetti.
"E" is for everything I forget to mention in this go round.

"F" is for my friends. Starting with my husband, kids, parents and siblings, then on to Craig, Catherine, Coleen, Hilda, Macrina, Mafe & ...

Oooooo. This feels so good I don't want to stop! The more I write the more I smile and the more my body relaxes. Maybe this is the very best technique of all! You know what they say about "saving the best for last."

So Moms - Got a minute? Got pen? Got a journal? Got at least a page of paper?

3 Easy Ways and they are oh so portable. You can take them into waiting rooms, check out lines, recitals - heck even bumper to bumper traffic ... Well, that's an advanced technique.

How ever - when ever - one thing is for sure. After you do, Ahhhhhhhhh. You will feel much, much better. So will the rest of your day.

© 2006 Viveca Stone-Berry, former fatigue sufferer and author of the Fatigue Be Gone! Jumpstart e-Guide. Viveca is also the founder of The Get Ready for Love! Show.