Are You Going to Be My Real Mommy?

I received a phone call from the Department of Family and Children's Services from Wisconsin, one afternoon. The woman on the other end of the phone was warm, and concerned for my nieces from the sound of her voice on the phone. I had a few conversations with her about my 3 nieces and one on the way prior to this, so I knew that Kate was a very warm, caring individual, who took her job quite seriously, and did it well. The news was that my sister-in-law was still in jail for whatever her newest wrong doings were, and she would be when she delivered number 4. My husband and I had already been planning to take all of the children, when it was possible, and my sister-in-law could no longer 'just show up and take them out of our home willy nilly,' according to her whim. We had all agreed that this would be the best course of action, for the children, from many long conversations between the caseworker and my husband and me. The case worker then explained that we could begin taking the children home because a judge had intervened and decided that their mother no longer controlled or cared for her children, with her drug problem, and the crimes committed to obtain the later.

We made arrangements to get there as soon as possible, after the baby was born, to get the baby and my 3 year old niece. The other two would remain there, to give my sister-in-law incentive to clean up her act and just maybe be able to get her life in order, drug free. This did not ever happen, but the intent was there. (Shortly after that we picked up the other two girls and then my nephew, when he was born, as well.) When we found out that my sister-in-law was in labor, I called and made the airline reservations and other arrangements to pick up the two girls. I headed out with a diaper bag and suitcases in hand for both girls, nervous and excited to be getting part of the children out of the 'system' and back to family who love them. I got in touch with my other sister-in-law (who is not on drugs and had been a wonderful help, with her life stable and law abiding) to pick me up at the airport. This sister-in-law is my husband's older sister and her husband.

Upon my arrival at my other sister and brother-in-law's home, I called the case worker and let her know we were there. To my surprise, she put me in touch with another senior case worker, who had the paperwork, nearby my location to pick up the girls the next day. I was so excited that I hardly slept. The baby had just been born that day. A healthy baby girl, 9 pounds and 11 ounces. Gratefully, she was healthy and pink. We now know that she was healthy because of my sister-in-law was in jail at the time of her birth. (She went on to have another baby, who we now have in addition to the 4 girls, a little boy who was born with her not in jail, who was only 6 pounds, 5 ounces when we picked him up, two days after birth. She had also had a dirty drug test 2 days prior to his birth.)

The next day, we picked up the baby first at the hospital. It was the hardest, and easiest thing I have ever had to do. To take the baby away from my sister-in-law, just a short while after birth, was heart wrenching. With the love we have for my sister-in-law, she is my husband's baby sister, although, she was 30 years old at the time. It was hard to take the baby away with her crying, but I knew that it was the best thing for the baby, who cannot care for herself. That is why it was the hardest and easiest thing I have ever had to do. The doctor had already signed the baby's release papers and given her a clean bill of health, when we arrived to take her home. I sat down with the nurse for the baby's discharge instructions and to answer a few questions from the nurse, but when she realized that this was the 7th newborn baby I was about to take home from the hospital, in my lifetime, she went over the required basics and signed the release. We dressed the baby and bundled her up, and we left the hospital.

Our next stop was to pick up my 3 year old niece from the foster home that she had been placed in. The family was waiting for us. They were nice, and I thanked them for caring for her, until we could get her. Upon picking her up, there was only one outfit for her, and one panty and one pair of sox for her little feet, in addition to the clothing she wore. She had a 'toy' size suitcase for her and that was all, inside was also one doll. I was so glad I had gone shopping for her before ever coming to get her, and had packed accordingly. In addition, I had made her a blanket to match my daughter's blanket, who is less than 12 hours older than she is. She became very attached to the blanket right away. We spent the night at my sister and bother-in-law's home and set out for the airport in the morning.

With both girls in tow, we got to the airport with diaper bags, suitcases and several other family members met us at the airport to bid us good bye, and see the girls before we left. The announcement came to board with small children, I had some help and had two diaper bags, and the baby in the front carrier, and my 3 year old niece holding my hand, we walked tword the plane, down the ramp. My niece looked up at me, with her big, brown, beautiful eyes full of wonder, and asked me in a very serious voice "Are you going to be my mommy now?? I knelt down, holding the baby in place, in the middle of the ramp. I told her "yes" and to my surprise, the huge smile that came over her face said it all. I asked her if that made her happy, and she kept smiling and shaking her head yes. The stream of tears that were running down my face at that happy moment were uncontrollable, as we continued on down that ramp to the plane.

We have since adopted all 5 of my sister-in-law's children, and that memory will always stay with me, when my daughter let me know that first time that she was happy for me to be her mommy. She is now eleven, and she knows that I will be her mommy forever. The children are all happy and healthy and are safe, and know they are loved, and in a happy and stable home, with a mommy who loves them all.