There is nothing more difficult than letting go of past pain caused by a relationship. Whether you were cheated on, bullied, or he simply left without giving you a reason, you will always feel terrible afterwards. Problems begin when the sadness turns to resentment, and often, you may not even realize it's there. Recently, I found some old photos of my ex, and was filled with a fleeting moment of rage at the way things ended. We haven't been together in more than six years, I am in another, happy relationship, and yet that feeling was unmistakable. It surprised me to learn that after all this time, I am still hanging on to feelings of resentment. Here are a few signs that you may need to let go of the past.
You find it hard to stay in a relationship
When you're ready to meet someone new, it can be very exciting. However, even with the thrill of being with someone else, you might find yourself looking for ways to sabotage the relationship. Sometimes it is simply because you know he's not right for you, but often it is because you are still too angry to settle down. The saddest thing about taking this path is that you end up suffering more by not giving yourself a chance to love again. If you are in the midst of breaking up with someone, make sure you are doing it for the right reasons, and not because you are holding on to past anger.
You get annoyed by memories of your ex
When I discovered the photos of my ex, I was genuinely surprised by how I felt. In my head, I believed I had moved on and was well and truly over all of the upset. If you find yourself feeling inexplicably irritated by memories of your former boyfriend, there are probably still some issues to resolve. Take some time out of your day to write down anything that comes to mind, because once it is out of your system, you will feel a whole lot better.
You hate happy couples
I used to have a single friend who openly loathed any couple that looked happy. I could never understand why she would wish misery on people who were enjoying their lives together. What's the point in that? It wasn't until much later that I learned how awful her last relationship was, and she felt that she deserved just a fraction of the happiness those couples had. While I understood her thought process, it is no way to live. Have you ever found yourself scowling at people who are loved-up? If so, stop and think about the deeper reasons why. You may be surprised to learn that you are still hanging on to past feelings.
More from this contributor:
Published by Kyra Lennon - Featured Contributor in Lifestyle
Kyra Lennon has been writing for most of her life. Alongside working on her first full length novel, Kyra has published online content with a focus on dating and relationships, entertainment and travel. A... View profile
- Letting Go of Holiday TraditionsSometimes, it becomes necessary to let go of established holiday traditions during times of change and transition. This article explores the process of letting go...
- Letting Go of a Bipolar Family MemberLetting go of a family member with bipolar is a very hard thing to do but it is not as hard as one might think it is. Your household will go from chaos to peacefulness somewhat in just a few short weeks, once you all...
- Is Our Society Letting Go of It's Morals?Is our society letting go of it's morals?
- Letting GoMany times we think we have it all together and have control of our lives but the truth is, many times we don't have any control at all and just need to let go.
- Letting Go of Outcomes Reduces AnxietyThis article briefly shows one how to engage in the thought process of letting go, and how that reduces one's anxiety.
- Letting Go Quotes
- Mastering the Art of Letting Go
- Letting Go and Living Well
- Letting Go of My Rain Cloud
- Book Review: Letting Go of the Words, Writing Web Content that Counts
- Notes from the Counselor on Letting Go
- Letting Go When Your Love Interest Won't Commit



