Are Pirates the Voting Ace Up Ron Paul's Sleeve?

Ron Paul, which the collective 3% of Florida presumably referred to as "hope for America", was once again handed a defeat in the Florida Republican Primaries. But for all this said, maybe pundits, pollsters, and the vast majority of voters are missing on a certain demographic that has been otherwise untapped by the other candidates during this super charged political season. That is, what about the pirate demographic?

No, I'm not talking about internet pirates, or those that the RIAA is cracking down on (not the 10 year old girls or the 80 year old grandmothers either). I'm talking about the real high seas adventurers, the swashbucklers, the privateers, the buccaneers, those sea lovin' eye-patched parrot companioned captains that kidnap and ravage and don't give a hoot?

This may seem like a wild, explosive, to some even insane idea, but then Ron Paul has so far been the only presidential candidate to court international piracy. Indeed, as the others attempt to fix the economy through supplying American workers with jobs and disposable income, Ron Paul offers the unique dual benefit of withdrawing all American troops from overseas, and replacing them with privateers - giving all out of work pirates a chance to get their own disposable income, which some experts believe may be the key boost this nation needs.

Indeed, the Letters of Marque and Reprisal Act of 2001 is a unique beacon of hope for pirates everywhere, as it asks Americans to outsource their wars not to scumbag mercenary groups like Blackwater or Aegis, but rather to put it in the hands of those with centuries of experience, specifically, pirates. The act calls for direct Presidential control over "letters of marque" that allow privateers to collect up to $40 million bounties on any target that the executive branch chooses, as long as they are associates of al-Qaeda, or "enemy combatants", of course.

For those unsure of what a Letter of Marque is, as Ron Paul so vociferously argues we need to institute to find Osama bin-Laden, it is a document that originated in the 18th century to capitalize on highly experienced pirate crews. Britain, France, and Spain, quarreling over the vast sea empires that they both controlled, would often hire the mercenary forces of pirates, and grant them a Letter of Marque which acted as a warrant to search, seize, and destroy nautical assets of other nations. Both in essence and practice, the recipients of the letters were given free rein to pirate the seas, as long as they flew the national flag of those they were pirating on behalf of, and did not plunder the ships of the contracting nation.

It was realized that government back pirates raping the high seas was probably not in the nations' best interests, and therefore at the Declaration of Paris in the 19th century, the parties involved agreed to cease giving privateers the right to do so. The United States was not present at the signing however, and perhaps Paul wishes to capitalize on this fact, even though it has already been American precedent since the Spanish American War to avoid utilizing privateers, stating that the U.S. will respect the tenants of the Declaration of Paris.

Paul's assertion that we need to "not risk American lives" fighting in Afghanistan is backed by his claim that Osama bin-Laden should not necessarily be identified as international terrorists, but rather as pirates - and that their actions on 9/11 should be constituted as air piracy, according to his presidential campaign website. Therefore, what better way to fight pirates, than with other pirates?

Following the United States and British clamp down on piracies, South Carolina and Florida have not exactly been havens for Pirates - and being landlocked, neither was Iowa. Therefore it stands to be seen just how this voting demographic will aid Ron Paul when more traditionally buccaneer strongholds such as Louisiana and Mississippi begin their primaries.

These pirates could very well be the ace up Ron Paul's sleeve that he so desperately needs to crawl out of his single digit failures.