Are Reality Dating Shows Really as Real as They Seem?

After the Y2K crisis subsided, the dawning days of the 21^st Century saw the resurrection of a television staple, namely the reality dating show. Like their predecessors, these shows bring real men and women together in the hopes that romance will blossom-and ratings will soar. Unfortunately, it seems that reality dating can be about as far from true love as one can get.

"The Dating Game" helped start the reality dating trend

As TV.com points out, "The Dating Game" is considered the premiere reality dating show of all time. Created by the legendary Chuck Barris, this daytime dating series matched one woman with three bachelors and vice-versa. Answering question sight unseen, the bachelors or bachelorettes had to plead their case, hoping to be the one chosen for a dream date.

The Game Show Network sometimes hosts marathon, showing episodes of the original "Dating Game," and these videotapes are like tiny time capsules from the 1960's and 70's. Up-and-coming celebrities such as Steve Martin and Paul "Pee-Wee Herman" Reubens appeared on the show long before they became cultural icons.

Can opposites attract and make a "Love Connection" on national television?

Light and fun, the original "Dating Game" was a show without a mean bone in its body. On the other hand, people watched "Love Connection," one of its reality offspring, to see male and female contestants go for each other's throats. The premise, once again, was deceptively simple: a bachelor or bachelorette watched videotapes of potential dates, choosing one to accompany them for a night on the town.

This sounds simple enough on paper, but the fireworks typically began once both contestants were allowed to dish dirt on the other. In many cases, the men and women did not find that fabled "Love Connection," choosing to criticize the other's manners and appearance. That's not good behavior, but it does make for great television.

Darva Conger and "Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire?"

In the history of Reality TV dating shows, none is more infamous and embarrassing than "Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire?", the show that matched a wealthy bachelor with a group of women who wanted to marry a guy with money. Darva Conger, an emergency room nurse, married so-called millionaire Rick Rockwell on national television, but the whole thing was annulled within months of the "Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire" finale.

It would have been amazing if this reality dating show actually had caught on, but the whole idea of pairing up materialistic women with a guy who said he had money flamed out in spectacular fashion, with Darva Conger shedding her clothes later that year for "Playboy." Rockwell, by the way, was not quite the millionaire he claimed to be.

The birth of the "The Bachelor"

Despite the bad taste that "Who Wants to Marry a Millionaire?" left in everyone's mouth, a successful show called "The Bachelor" rose from the ashes of that previous disaster. The show began nearly a decade ago, with beautiful women vying for the attentions of one great-looking, well-to-do single guy. Through a series of dates and eliminations, the bachelor selects his true love from this field of hopefuls.

Unfortunately, even that first edition of "The Bachelor" was filled with controversy. According to an insightful report by Steven Rogers over at RealityTV.com and a "TV Guide" interview, Alex Michel, the first "Bachelor," kept in contact with runner-up Trista Rehn, even after he chose Amanda Marsh.

Rehn went on to become the show's first true success story, finding her husband on the inaugural edition of "The Bachelorette" while Marsh and Michel broke up.

Can love blossom in front of reality TV cameras?

Eight years after the first edition of "The Bachelor," the show has an incredible fan base and plenty of Internet buzz. Still, there are plenty of questions that need to be answered about reality dating shows:

• Is it possible to find love while the cameras are rolling? Perhaps, but as is the case with most reality shows, creative editing allows producers to "cast" the "Bachelor" and "Bachelorette" contestants into certain roles (i.e. hero, heroine, villain, villainess, good girl, etc.). Staff members edit hundreds of hours of footage to produce one episode, which means many events are taken out of context.

• Do some bachelors and bachelorettes cave under pressure? At the end of a televised romantic journey, audiences are expecting one man and one woman to walk off into the sunset together, so the pressure is high to get an on-camera proposal. Brad Womack made "Bachelor" history, though, by rejecting both Deanna Pappas and Jenni Croft on his edition of the show. It's easy to dismiss Womack as a wimp or jerk for his actions, but given the track record of "The Bachelor," it can be argued that Womack was pretty honest with his feelings.

• Are some men and women just looking for their 15 minutes of fame? Absolutely. On "The Bachelor: London Calling," the edition following the Womack/Pappas/Croft controversy, producers seemed desperate to get the happy ending denied them by Womack. Was it any coincidence, therefore, that British Bachelor Matt Grant chose Shayne Lamas, daughter of actor Lorenzo Lamas? Shayne is cute-as-a-button, but comes across about as deep as a mud puddle. It seems a safe bet to say that Grant was looking for a diversion and Lamas wanted to give her own acting career a jump start. They gave each other and America what they wanted, but broke up months after the finale.

"Hitch" and Reality Dating

Reality dating is not all bad, but it would be nice if producers took a page or two from "Hitch," the Will Smith movie about a "date doctor." Smith plays Alex "Hitch" Hitchens, a man who "creates opportunities" for men to get to know the women that they secretly adore. In the movie, Kevin James is a shy, awkward investment counselor desperately in love with one of his clients and seeks Hitch's help.

A show that used Alex Hitchens methodology, namely creating real opportunities for contestants instead of manufactured fantasies, could be a winner for both the networks as well as the men and women who appear on the show.

Resources:

http://www.tv.com/the-dating-game/show/5410/summary.html

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0170968/

http://www.nndb.com/people/836/000031743/

"The Baltimore Sun," "Reality Check: '20/20' Takes on 'The Bachelor'," Sarah Kelber

Reality TV World, "'Bachelor' Alex Michael and 'Bachelorette' Trista Rehn continued relationship after Michael selected Amanda Marsh," Steven Rogers