Are Strollers Necessary?
It is Possible to Parent Without Relying on Plastic
Strollers are a repulsive icon of modern society. A human infant in the year 2007 can spend most of his early months being shuffled from one plastic contraption to the next. Sadly, many expectant parents consider strollers as one of the main necessities for raising a baby.
As I encounter what seems to be nearly 98% of parents relying on strollers, I am left to wonder what is so repulsive about carrying your small baby or toddler. Babies thrive on close interaction and love to be in held in close proximity to their caregivers. Propping a baby up in a plastic device on wheels and pushing it around hardly qualifies as healthy human interaction. I've had adults stare at me like I just stepped out of a remote tribal village when they fail to locate a stroller within five feet of me. "What no stroller?" is their dumbfounded response, aghast that I would actually prefer to carry my own child. It makes me wonder why people with such harsh (and lazy) attitudes ever bothered to procreate at all. Parenting certainly is easier when you only spend thirty minutes of every day holding your child.
By now you might be wondering if I own a stroller. Actually, I do. I gave into the peer pressure and constant nagging and purchased one when my daughter was about four months old. I kept it around for appearance sake. It served as a great method of carrying my packages when I went shopping, but many times I just left it in the trunk of our car. Although the stroller was convenient for carrying packages, strollers aren't usually very well received by childless shoppers. Strollers take up a lot of unnecessary space, and it is just as easy to walk to the car between purchases and deposit the shopping bags there. Occasionally, if you've had an extremely bad day, are sick, or have a dozen errands to run, pull out the stroller. But the families I see with strollers and the comments I've received from other parents when they see our baby sling (which both my husband and I have used) clearly indicate that they view strollers as a necessity they would not be able to live or function without. If you can't parent your child without relying on a dizzying assortment of plastic contraptions, it's time to rethink your parenthood status. Of course, it's probably already too late by that point.
Even my daughter's pediatrician jumped on the ridicule bandwagon and insisted I purchase a stroller. I quickly found a new pediatrician when she "warned me" that I wouldn't physically be able to carry my daughter (who was two months at the time) around for much longer without hurting my back. Hello! This lady was middle-aged, moderately obese, and it's really none of her business how I parent my child. Little did she know I'm a sporadic recreational power lifter so the thought of carrying my 15-pound baby around hardly elicited a concern about injury, and at four years old I still carry her when she asks. I don't ridicule her into being "a big girl." The need to be held close and carried will be gone soon enough; I don't need to force it. The fact that our pediatrician was a medical professional with an upper level degree demonstrates just how susceptible and gullible we, as humans, are to the power of clever marketing. We are schooled into believing we "just can't live without" expensive and unnecessary products. We are left to think that parenting wouldn't be possible without baby registries and brand names like Gerber, Graco, and Evenflo. Wake up call, everyone! Parents have been raising children for centuries without spending a small fortune on unnecessary contraptions whose unintended side effect is to separate and distance babies from the healthy emotional connection they need, and that healthy emotional connection can only be achieved by spending time together. Sure, wealthy English nobility during the 1800s employed wet nurses and nannies to handle their children, but the fact is their kids were held by someone even if it wasn't the primary caregiver.
It is possible many parents prefer the convenience they mistakenly believe strollers give them, and obviously the more children you add to your life, the more chaotic and excessively busy your life can become, which increases your vulnerability to being susceptible to relying on plastic transport devices to get you through the day. But the fact is most parents are using strollers-parents of only children, parents of twins, parents of multiple children, biological parents, adoptive parents, grandparents, and parents old enough to be grandparents. Everywhere I turn, I am overrun with strollers. Stroller parents would have at least a little reprieve if their children actually enjoyed being in the stroller. Sadly, most do not. I've seen way too many distressed infants being "pressed" into their strollers rather unwillingly. Sure, the crying subsides eventually not because the babies are content but because eventually they realize it's pointless to cry when they know that they will continue to be ignored.
Parents, try the following New Year's resolution for the year 2007-make a vow to actually parent and interact with your child. Buy a baby sling or cloth carrier and hold your baby close the next time you go out shopping. Let your child see the world from your perspective not isolated in a mobile restraining device.
Published by S.V.
Sharon has been a freelance writer and editor for the past three years. View profile
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53 Comments
Post a CommentVery cool article. I agree- tons of baby products are considered mandatory purchases, but really aren't that necessary. Many three-month-old babies in America have more material possesions than whole households own in less developed countries, which is kinda sad!
I just wish the mentality would change. I had culturally conditioned expectations about parenthood before becoming a parent, and none of them turned out to be true. "Babies get sick all the time"- my almost 5yo has never had an ear infection and had her first cold at 17 mths "Babies spit up all the time" My daughter rarely spit up. The list goes on, but obviously includes "Having a baby requires so much gear." I just think we as a society need to reexamine commonly held ideas about parenting and reevaluate whether they are actually working or are even necessary.
Yes, I admit the article is extreme in parts. I still do think a lot of parents use strollers excessively for poor reasons. Ultimately, as I said in some earlier comments, parents can parent however they please, and that is really what prompted my article. My NOT using a stroller shouldn't be a basis for comments or criticisms. Most people do think slings are cute, so a stranger at the mall doesn't realize I wore a sling all the time. But for parents who I interact with on a more regular basis, I think the negativity to babywearing isn't justified.
You made some good points, but your article did seem a little extreme to me. You didn't seem to consider WHY some people are using their strollers. And you assumed that all babies hate strollers. I use a stroller often with my son. He loves it. We go on outdoor walks and we take the dogs. I couldn't hold his hand (he's 14 months) and the dogs' leashes at the same time. I have a bad back and am not supposed to carry more than 15 lbs (my son weighs almost 26). Carrying him for long isn't an option for me. My husband does carry him a lot. And I HOLD him a lot in my lap. I play with him more than a lot of parents I know that carry their kids all the time. The stroller is still a very important part of our routine. And he still has plenty of time when he isn't strapped in something. The only other plastic thing he is commonly strapped in is his high chair. And that's only while he eats, though I guess that is several times a day!
Very interesting article, since I cherish every moment with my 17 month old, I love holding her and rarely use my stroller But on extended trips it can be a lifesaver.
Strollers can be useful but you are right that they can also be overdone.
great article! thank you for commenting on my piece about being single. I have a lot of single friends that love being single i on the other hand love my fiance lol good luck on future articles have a great day and be safe!
L Sheperd- Ultimately, other than summing up my thoughts in an article like this, I'm actually one of those parents that doesn't interfere. That means if I see a child standing up in their grocery cart near me, I might hang out for a minute until the mom comes back to the cart, but I never say anything. I've seen other adults be much more vocal and confrontational with parents. In this case, it could be warranted when the child's safety is at risk, but admittedly, I don't involve myself as I feel my primary responsibility is to my own child. Plus, it might be hard to believe, I really don't want to criticize another parent.
L. Sheperd- I really don't want to criticize other parenting styles or parents. I think it happens all too often as it is. Any person can have a child any time they wish, that includes teenagers and women in their mid to late 40s. It's not my call, and if someone wants 10, 12, or more children, that's fine too. I really would never criticize that. (Other parents think I'm crazy for actually wanting a decent age gap, so everyone is different.) I'm even fascinated with the Duggar family. I would like to evaluate why a parent feels it's necessary to push a crying, hysterical into a stroller so they can continue shopping. Order online if your child is that upset. I'd prefer my own child not see her entire first or second year of life from a low-riding stroller with a severely limited view. And I don't consider childwearing an extreme of attachment parenting. Most healthy babies love to be held a lot. Perhaps, a few with stimulation issues don't enjoy it, but I do feel an overwhelming m
L. Sheperd- If I have second child, the gap will be well over 5 years, so I won't need to use a stroller or multiple strollers. I plan to have the number of children that I can care for in the way I see fit. If I end up with twins, I can carry both, if I end up with triplets, which would be a long shot from a natural conception, then my husband would carry one the times he is with me and I'd use a stroller and rotate everyone. But I see plenty of parents of only one child and multiple adults in tow sometimes and strollers are still being used. I'm challenging the idea that parents/society seem to feel that strollers are an indispensable product that life would not be possible without. Does a parent have to reach for a stroller every single time they venture out in public? that's what I'd really like readers to consider