Are You Taking Your Mate for Granted?

We all get to the point in our relationships where we are too comfortable. It's that point at which we say and do things that can be hurtful to our mates. It pays to check our behavior from time to time to be sure that we are treating our mates in a way that makes them feel valued and loved. A valued mate will return the favor and nurture the relationship in kind. It is this kind of relationship that makes for a long and happy union.

Do you take your mate for granted? Ask yourself these questions.

Do I talk behind my mate's back?

Anything you would not say in your mate's presence should not be said when they are not around to defend themselves. Remember, things you say have a way of shaping the way others feel. Your mood might change but the perception you leave in someone's mind about your mate will live on.

Do I ignore my mate's wishes?

When your mate asks you to do something, they count on you to complete it just as when you ask them a favor you expect the same. Everyone knows the feeling of being let down. Each time you let your mate down you lower their expectations of you and their perception of your worth. If you want a loyal, trustworthy mate, be one.

Do I neglect my mate's needs?

When your partner has unmet needs they will look elsewhere to fill them. If you refuse to cook, they will go out for food, if you keep your surroundings messy they will find a more comfortable spot in which to live, it is human nature to gravitate toward something that fills a void. Find out what your partner needs and fill the void for a satisfied mate who will satisfy you in return.

Do I know what's important to my mate?

Nothing is more frustrating than when your mate's best friend buys them a better birthday gift than you do. It happens so often because a best friend is constantly aware of what their pal is asking for. Best friends speak candidly. Become your mate's best friend. Ask them what they want and do your best to provide it! NEVER ridicule a request, it leads to hidden desires.

Do I plan for a future with my mate?

Can you see yourself with your mate in five years? Ten? Can you see yourself rocking on the porch with them in retirement? Having something to look forward to in a relationship helps keep both partners moving in the same direction. Plan for the future with your mate by making short and long-term goals. Getting there is all the fun!

Do I continue to learn from my mate?

Maybe it's only patience that you have learned from your mate and that's a start, but each day look for the little lessons you are offered. Because both of you have different life experiences you have learned things the other has not. As long as you continue to draw knowledge from your mate you will never be bored.

Do I have anything to teach my mate?

Just as you need to learn from your mate so should you teach them. Are they doing something in a counterproductive way that drives you mad? Gently show them the easy way and watch as they learn in gratitude. It may take them a few tries but it can be fun to watch the progress. If you teach what you know, you will constantly look for new things to share and that will benefit both of you! One of the things you must teach your mate is how to fulfill your needs. If you ask for what you want in a respectful and honest way chances are you will get it.

Taking your mate for granted is the quickest way to get them to discard you for someone who appreciates the wonderful person you saw when the two of you were just starting out. Nurture that person and by giving value to their many talents and good traits you may find more and spend many happy years together!