Ask Meg

My ex-girlfriend messaged me and apparently she has been looking at my profile. I set it to private and I guess she still looks at what mood I'm in or something. I said in my mood that I won some money in the lotto and she messaged me to tell me that I owed her fifteen bucks of it. I think she just messaged me so I could see her new picture with her boobs hanging out. What is up with this chick, Be thorough. I don't get her. She has to make a point to look at my page or try to now that its private, but why. She knows I'm married now too. Help me understand. Maybe she is trying to keep some kind of contact.

?

Dear ?,

Of course she's trying to keep some contact. That's obvious. What you need to do is this...go to her profile..under her picture where it says message me, add me..all that stuff..it also says block user. Click block user..another pop up will come up saying "are you sure you want to block this user?"..you click yes! Problem solved. She can no longer message you. That's all you need to do. Don't answer the message she already sent you either. You are married. Period. She is just (once again I repeat myself)...pulling your strings and you are letting her. Stop!!! She's history and that is that. For the record, she's also behaving in an immature and destructive manner to both herself and you. She knows your married. She wants to cause problems and hurt you and she can only accomplish that if you LET HER!! Again...stop!!! The best response is no response. She's acting like a stalker. Fortunately for you it's only in cyberspace which is easy enough to put a stop to.
Now...my advice only works if you actually follow it my friend....that's the magic of it!! ;)

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Dear Meg,

I recently split from the father of my children after 11 years together. The magic is just gone. We were very young when we got together. Now he's calling me all the time and trying to use our kids as a way to see me. He keeps asking for a second chance and although I feel bad, I am all out of second chances. I don't know how to get this through to him. Also, I met someone else and he makes me feel really good about myself. The problem is that he lied to me about having a vasectomy AFTER we had already slept together. I think about him all the time. It has been a really long time since I felt passion and he is really good. My friends tell me to leave him alone because he lied to me. What should I do?

Frustrated Mom

Dear Frustrated,

How long has it been since you and your baby daddy split? If it's less than six months, stop being selfish by seeing another guy so soon. Your kids need you right now more than ever and as hard as it may be to hear, it's not about you right now. It's about your kids. They need to feel loved and stable while you and your ex-whatever get yourselves straight! First, the baby daddy is just striking out and trying to manipulate you emotionally. Don't let him. Get a lawyer and do this thing properly by setting up specific visitation while child custody/support is being handled in court. A good idea would be to let a third party handle all calls from him concerning the children until all the hurt feelings over the breakup dissipate. Once emotions are under control, you two should be able to communicate in a civil manner about the children. Now....for the other matter. Sounds like you haven't had a good midnight bumping in a while and someone handed you a saltine cracker that tasted like a Ritz to you. Don't get the two confused. What kind of guy would lie to you about a vasectomy? This is a guy who didn't want to use protection for his own selfish reasons and didn't care one whit about whether or not he impregnated you or passed along an STD. This guy is a loser and your friends are right. Pull your head out and get it on straight. Don't do things that you know, as an adult, are stupid and destructive. Don't call this guy and don't accept his calls. Go cold turkey. There are plenty of Ritz crackers out there and one will be there when you're ready for.it. Now is not that time. Again, I stress that you need to put all your energy into your kids at this time. Be a mother. Be strong. Be the adult in this situation and good luck to you.

If you have any questions you can't ask anyone else, ask Meg! Send your comments and questions to megwynn@msn.com. If you can take it, I can dish it out!