Asking Her Out: An Intricate Simplicity

It is a contention in the heart and head, but with an easy but subtle solution: understanding, logic and simple sentiments. With these, I will reemphasize that asking her out is an intricate simplicity. There is no doubt the "burden" falls on us, men, to understand the nature of this concept, since by norm we are the initiator of courtship. Thus, I will like to assert that the idea and reality of attempting to ask a woman out turned out to be intricate solely by our erroneous doings; partly due to misunderstanding, lack of vigor, and at times foolhardiness.

The blunders can be listed to an infinite degree but I will like to point out significant ones, which include the most crucial of all: lack of understanding (knowledge). At the onset of male puberty, when there is that little perception of the man-woman thing; questions are deliberated upon in our heads as to how to fit into our new role as men and affirm our social status among our peers, chiefly among girls. At this point, I will state that it is cruel that our bodies mature faster than our minds-in most cases. We suddenly find ourselves from the boy that enjoys wheeling cart to a man so much is expected from. It reflects in a lot of our endeavors including the subject at hand. Hence at an early age (when we are expected to be men) we yearn for the girl of our dreams and we proceed about it in a boyish manner. And unfortunately, like any other woman, the girl of our dreams, even when young, definitely expects manly gesture and frowns at immature ones. What I am trying to point out is the fact that we, men, whom so much is expected from, need to grow up fast, and if possible outgrow the feminine specie in mind because that is what will prove us as who we are assumed to be, and not our bodily features. This primary factor stressed, can be said to be the basis of a lot of our flawed actions when asking her out.

The Lack of confidence (a long-time plight). The very essence of a man is strength, courage and bravery. It is the core of our ability. In the medieval age, it was well expressed in the gruesome battles fought, and the man that displayed such attributes vividly was acknowledged as man. Also on the field, which involves the hard labor and sweat to be able to cultivate to feed a family conveniently, as well as to hunt for them. By these vital traits, a man is considered a potential betrothed to a number of virgin young women. Today, we live in the comfort zone of peace-relatively, and technology of easy labor. Nevertheless, a woman still wants to perceive these characteristics in our being;

appreciating them as ambitious; pronounced but not exaggerated self-esteem; unwavering mindset and confidence. Figuratively, she wants a sturdy arm to lean on. However, in most crisis of asking-her-out, this has always been prominent factor for a long time. Most men express weakness when declaring their heart-felt interest for a woman and in the process make a mockery of romance. A man, by true nature, should not be anxious whatsoever of doing this. It is demeaning to our status. Even if she will turn you down-which you ought to have averted before approaching her-you need to keep your head up, your voice unshaken, an eye-contact, with an amiable smile to accept whatever response that comes your way. It is necessary for the next time, because that girl is not the only perfect being for you on the globe, believe it or not. It is a duty and an essential part of you to always act as a confident man in all spheres because in the long run, it will definitely endear you to your dream woman someday.

It is noteworthy that ones appearance speaks of oneself. It serves as a lasting first impression. This need not be emphasized on, but for the sake of clarity I will elucidate. It is goodto look good. It makes us a viable being-so to speak. Basically, I believe it differentiate us from animals. Still, by just putting on clothes is not enough to prove us as man being. We ought o be able to groom ourselves to a point of splendor. Furthermore, we ought to be creative with it in a manly conservative way, bringing about a dynamic brilliance. However it is not only the attire that illustrates a good appearance, but a thorough cleanliness. From the spotlessness of our garment, including those beneath and on the surface; the fine-trim of the hairs and nails on our body to that cologne that accentuate our personality we can pronounce ourselves irresistible to any woman. We don't have to be Brad Pitt handsome to attract the woman of our dream; you just have to let her see the beauty of the true you. This should be a part and parcel of us because you don't know when that golden opportunity will come by-when you will meet her-and as I have stated earlier, it serves as a lasting first impression. This issue is very vital to us, men, and it is a shame that women seem to understand this and express themselves fashionably well than we do. They have arrested this facet to a point that fashion has been considered a female norm.

It is important to envisage a course of action. Spontaneity may appear romantic, but a strategic step-by-step process guarantees a smooth delivery of the proposal. It erases the opportunity for clumsiness and likelihood for failure in any aspect. From the initiating speech, to possible defensive demeanor she might front; nothing should be overlooked. The problem of not planning may involve the probability of confronting a quandary and being incapable to deal with it, or worse, making futile efforts. Such as a problem of being obliged to pay for a good or service rendered to her while you are with are for the first time. If such happens, and you were unable to prove yourself, you may have created a bad first impression, which might be amendable. But why let such happen when you can prevent it. It is necessary and advisable to go about asking-her-out in a recital manner.

Furthermore, a good preparation can reflect on the ideal course of asking-her-out. The ideal course which I will like to stipulate as soliciting for her attraction, which when achieved creates an easy platform to assert your claims for her. These two steps may take sometime but can be of no-time if a man can step up and play it right. It involves partly the strategic planning and my believe-to-be inherent manly features stated earlier, which can only work when properly harnessed. Soliciting for her attraction may also include the manly gestures of courteous greetings, paying her moderate compliments, finding an opportunity to pay for her lunch-break meal, arousing her sense of humor and all sorts that will endear you to her. Asserting your claim for her requires that mannish confidence and, as in the act itself, assertion. A man should proclaim his interest for her loud and clear without any inhibition from him. This, alone, drives home the point with a strong element of persuasion. The lady is fluttered by such manly vivacity, she has no option but to adore and revere his essence. The third step, which might be considered as the early part of post asking-her-out is to be fun and loving being your true self; better put, your better self. This can be well demonstrated on a fantastic date that is well planned for. It is worth mentioning that beneath that manly verve she appreciates, a woman still wants to see a person she can relate with personally. A man she can share with. Therefore, at this stage, it is a paramount duty to open up and draw her into you by being caring, loving, sensitive to her needs and making her feel at ease, which is being fun. And at the accomplishment of this, both of you will have the feel of that sentiment termed Happy Ever After.

With these, I rest my notion that asking her out is an intricate simplicity, because what it takes is what is or should be part of us as men, and mere common sense; for it only requires understanding and harnessing our God-given attributes.