Associated Content: Circa 1776

If you're reading this, then chances are that you like Associated Content and all it has to offer. Recently, I managed to hack into the archives of AC in what was purely an effort based on the thirst for knowledge - knowledge of the history of Associated Content! Lo and behold, imagine my surprise when I discovered that AC had existed in a pre-natal form in the year 1776! Apparently, it was a very popular medium in the thirteen colonies of the USA, and was first started by Paul Revere as a means for information and opinions to travel quicker. Revere must have not liked Gutenberg or something...anyway, I managed to come away with some examples of articles that some of the familiar personalities of that time period used to publish. Enjoy!

----George Washington used to frequently publish informative articles, such as "How to Care For Wooden Dentures" and "How To Cook Blueberry Pancakes."

----Ben Franklin, under the pen name PoorRichard69, would consistently post nothing but reviews on sexy lingerie and gossip on the latest celebrity breakup. His greatest triumph was his write-up on the continuing scandalous love affair between Thomas Jefferson and his 18 booty-calls.

----John Burgoyne had a nasty habit of downvoting anything and everything George Washington published, posting such comments as "Why did AC even post your trash on the front page" and "LOL I'm in yur base, killing yur dudez OMG redcoat rush kekeke."

----King George III took a great liking to writing up on the latest trends in video games. He was quite the nerd! Here's an excerpt from one his articles, entitled "Dost Luigi Have Right To Rebel?"
"When I take it upon myself to engage in Superior Mario Brethren, it occurs to me: Is this Luigi truly any different from those Yankee dogs? No, he is not and for this, I smite thee, Sir Miyamoto---for having the audacity to suggest that such a minor annoyance deserves a spot amongst such true knights as Mario, Peach, and His Holiness the Big Boo."

----Alexander Hamilton had a professional grudge with Thomas Jefferson ever since Tommy-Boy took the last breadstick when the Continental Congress ordered from Pizza Hut after a long day of debate. He would frequently post the opposite of whatever articles Jefferson did-for example, if Jefferson published something about how slow the Internet was running nowadays, Hamilton would take it upon himself to write "The Wonderful Speed Of My Browser And Why Jefferson Sucks."

----Thomas Paine was not a well-liked content producer, despite his deep arguments which dug into the merits of everyday life. His article entitled "Get Some Common Sense, You Idiots" did not sit well with other AC members, and almost resulted in his lifetime ban from the site.

-----James Madison was probably the most annoying AC producer of all time, opting to post every single thing about Paris Hilton's jail sentence at every hour of the day. His overall content tipped the scale at over 1,677 relatively meaningless articles. Fellow user John Hancock called Madison "a waste of space, and nothing more than a sensationalist brown-noser. Also, his negative review on the Fantastic Four sequel was totally uncalled for."

----Patrick Henry, writing under the name of "XxRomanceLostxX," was frequently referred to as being too much of a liberal and a crybaby. His most famous post came in his article "Why Does The World Hurt?" in which he stated "Give me liberty...or give me a razorblade to endeth the sorrow of this cruel world. Goodbye, Amy Lee-our love was not to be."

----Samuel Adams was generally a big showoff, never failing to remind everyone else that his beer was awesome. Due to spectacular sales of his ale on the side, he left the website for good in 2003.

-----Benedict Arnold was one of the more notorious and infamous of the AC producers in the 1700s, especially when he jumped sides in the American Revolution. His inbox was frequently flooded with snide remarks and frowny-face emoticons after his unpopular decision to surrender an American fort.

----Paul Revere himself published much content, and was the leader of an inkling group known as the Sons Of Liberty (Not to be confused with the group that took Arsenal Gear hostage.) He also became very famous after the publication of his article, "No Taxation Without Representation."

----TheMarquis de La Fayette was a popular personality on AC-maybe one of the best. His page views topped everyone else's, with a grand total exceeding the one million mark. His best-read article was "The Top Ten Reasons Why The Sopranos Finale Was Terrible."

As you can clearly see, Associated Content was well on its way, even in the 1700s. Hell, I wouldn't be surprised if it went back further than that; I only had time to put together a few examples before the administrator kicked me off the archive. My guess is that it existed well into the 1200s and beyond.

And I'm almost completely sure that Leif Erikson kept a blog recording the discovery of America.