Attracting Higher Quality Men, Rule 1

Don't let others fool you. Don't let the media make you believe you need a perfect body with a beautiful face to attract a man. The secrets of attraction go far beyond your looks. Granted if your look is well behind the times, you're going to meet men that live in the past. If you don't take care of yourself you are also disqualifying yourself from attracting a much more selective man. But you must remember this, attraction has no feelings one way or another. Attraction doesn't care. Attraction is a feeling! Attraction is energy.

I feel there's a misconception out there that men only want women who put out. Or give it up easily. But guess what? The only men you will attract by doing that, are men looking for easy sex and can not figure out how to get it. And what most experts in giving dating advice fail to tell you is, when you learn how to attract men, you will actually attract less men because the rules of attraction are really the secrets to attracting better quality men.

Rule 1. Don't give away all your secrets and don't ask to give away his. Keep the mystery alive. Make him wonder. If you ask a man one personal question after another he's going to know you're into him. Keep those questions to a minimal. You want to challenge him. Great men want great challenges. If you can step it up with a man and raise the risk reward trigger in his mind, you become a challenge.

There's a downside to this rule and I feel you should understand it before you go out and become such a challenge, you're left alone and dateless. It has to do with that risk reward I mentioned. Remember there is reward associated with the risk. For example. You meet this incredible guy and at some point he decides to lean in for a kiss. You're definitely into him but you also feel if you kiss him too early he might think you're too easy. So make it a little risky for him to kiss but remember to reward him for it. You want to tease but not be a tease.

You look into each others eyes and suddenly the world around you disappears. He looks at your lips, back up to your eyes, slowly leaning in. He gets as close as he can to you and confidently awaits for your lips to touch his. You both know it's your first kiss and you're scared this could make or break the current status of your relationship. Just as the moment is in its sexual peak, put your finger up to his lips in a seductive way, blocking his advancement. Now say something like this while looking directly in his eyes,

"You know you're kind of cute when you're trying to be sexy."

The risk, men hate being called cute and the reward, men love being perceived as sexy. Without doing much at all you have given him a choice. Risk being cute, for the reward of your affection. Real men take risks. Weak men will cower at this. Personally I would handle this little test in a couple ways, depending on the situation. I might push your finger away, then lean into your ear and whisper a coy comeback. Or I might just walk away smirking. Either way it just means you're doing it right.

I see attraction as an energy. It comes in different forms with varied strengths. Every one of us feel this energy and each one of us emit it. Man or woman, this energy is the same. When we combine all these different but similar energies we attract different types of people. Being a challenge is a combination of energies that consist of indifference, sexual flirtation, strength, and confidence. Combine these types one way, you will attract one man more consistently. Combine them another way and you will attract another type of man.

Too much indifference without much sexual flirtation and you will attract more men that see you as just a prize.

Too much sexual flirtation and not enough confidence you will attract more over protective men. The jealous guy.

Too much strength and being over-confident will attract men looking to date their mom. They are usually the submissive men that need to be taken care of.

I don't believe there's a perfect combination because men have preferences just like you. The combination I am most attracted to, at this time in my life, is just having confidence, more than an average supply of sexual flirtation, enough strength to handle life's hurdles, and indifferent enough to not let others affect her. To me a woman who possesses those traits, among many others, becomes just enough of a challenge to me. Any less and I become disinterested. Any more and I become skeptical.

Rule 1 is about being a challenge and testing men with risk and reward. But you're not the reward. The reward is the experience of being with you. The risk is putting himself out there. The risk is him stepping up, and being the better man. Then the reward to you then becomes attracting genuinely real men and having fun doing it.