Author and Former Lawyer Offers Unique Tips on How to Beat the Holiday Blues

Buddhist Disciple Offers Ways to Keep Those Sad Times Away at the Holidays

s.e. Jones

It might seem strange taking advice from a former lawyer and professor, but Toni Bernhard, is not just any former law practitioner, she's also a longtime Buddhist practitioner, and now contributing writer for Psychology Today. In a recent post, she applies what she's learned about Buddhism to the serious topic of avoiding the different types of sadness that can strike people around the holidays.

One of the first ways people can avoid sudden sadness that can seemingly appear out of nowhere around the holidays is to practice compassion. While this is clearly a term normally used when offering forgiveness to others, she says it's also a pretty nifty way to avoid getting down. Offer yourself some of that compassion that you're so willing to give others. Think of yourself as you would a good friend and offer kind words of compassion when circumstances seem to be heading in the direction of a drop in mood.

Next she explains that in Buddhism there is a concept known as Mudita, which means to find or cultivate joy in others. The idea being that if you help all those around you find joy, it will hard to not experience it yourself. This works particularly well when around children.

If that doesn't work, she suggests people consider something called Tonglen, which is a sort of relativistic term whereby a person finds their own senses taking on the expressions of another. In a way, it's a sort of counter-intuitive form of compassion. Here, people do the opposite of what they've normally been taught to do when trying to ward off sadness. Instead of breathing out bad thoughts for example, people breathe in the pain and suffering of others. The idea being, that no matter how sad things may appear, things could always be worse. She claims that if person is diligent in this, they are likely to find themselves laughing at their own silly emotions as there are always so many others who have it ever so much worse. She says it's actually more than that though, because in losing yourself in the misery of other's people tend to just automatically forget, at least for a moment, about giving into feelings of sadness. Which in a roundabout sort of way, is really what the holiday spirit is supposed to be all about.

So, she suggests, for those that fear the blues this holiday season, try a little Buddha on for size, it might just be the kick needed to keep those blues away.

Published by s.e. Jones - Featured Contributor in Technology

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