Average Family Size in the 20th and 21st Century

I'm always amused whenever I talk to my grandfather and he reminisces about growing up in a household with 12 children. My grandmother also fondly recalls other households with over 10 children that grew up around the same time as she did. I'm amused because I can't imagine it. I can't imagine the costs, both emotional and financial, that would be required to run a household with over 10 children.

LiveScience.com reports that the average number of people per household will soon dwindle to 2.6, a number that was 4.5 in 1915. Historic data as well as the memories of our elders support the notion that past generations reared more children than we do today. Without Supernanny, Ritalin, Dr. Phil, and a plethora of books on parenting, exactly how did the parents of generations past rear so many children? How were they able to support them financially?

My first explanation of how parents used to be able to manage more children was that they had to be stricter. I theorized that corporal punishment was used more extensively. That doesn't appear to the case. Even with many reports claiming to link spanking with a number of secondary side effects, 9 out of 10 parents still spank their toddlers. At least as many parents spanked their toddlers in 1915 but I bet the real difference was that no one ever gave them dirty looks at the grocery store for not hesitating to spank their children in public. There was no hesitation; their commitment to discipline and the methods required to go about it were unwavering.

A gradual trend has developed in America that prohibits any form of adult behavior that doesn't make children feel great about themselves. This philosophy has affected child discipline, school, and sports. Teams no longer have tryouts. Consolation prizes are awarded for 8th place in competitions. Teachers get criticized for grading papers too harshly. Half the time children aren't even watched by their parents so everyone has become uncertain on how to properly approach discipline.

50 years ago, a popular motto towards children and child rearing was "A child should be seen and not heard" but now that motto probably does something like this "A parent should not be seen or heard doing anything that's not directly for the children." Our shrinking friend and family circle has forced most parents to become playmates as well as caretakers. In the past, parents didn't have to fear letting their children run around the neighborhood all day as long as they were home before dinner. With increased crime and more unfamiliar neighborhoods, most parents get nervous at the mere thought of letting their children run around unsupervised.

I think it's the absence of necessary (or perceived necessary) supervision that allowed past generations to have many more children than we see in today's US households. Children were left out the house and could largely entertain themselves. Car seats, diaper wipe warmers, and baby walkers weren't necessary. Fewer accessories and parental attention were needed per child. No one scoffed at the idea of a 4 year old changing her sibling's diaper. Now, asking a child to perform such a task would be seen as preposterous because we don't think children should have to do anything that isn't fun anymore. My great grandfather went to work in the mines when he was 9.

The same socioeconomic forces that have dwindled the average household size have somehow caused an increased investment both in time and money, required for each child. Children now require various educational aids, iPhones by the time they're six, and computers. Parents feel guilty if their children are not constantly entertained and would fall over before adhering to the suggestion "Let them play and find something for themselves to do."

People used to respect their elders and that societal value has reversed so much that no one really gives a damn about you unless you're under 10 years old. The elders? We just throw them in nursing homes after we listen to their stories about how they grew up in large households.

Sources:

Heather Whipps, "Census: US household size shrinking." Livescience.com.

Amanda Gardner, "Spanking Raises Chances of Risky, Deviant Sexual Behavior." US News and World Report.

Bruce Posten, "Parents as Playmates." Reading Eagle, PA.