Basic Tips and Resources for Those Wishing to Marry a Russian Woman

John Harmon
When it comes to marrying a Russian woman, I believe I have heard it all by now, from all kinds of scams imaginable to happily ever after stories (there are a few of those around, including my own).

Despite all the bad publicity the so called mail-order-brides have received, despite all the horror stories of nasty divorces and false domestic violence charges, the interest of Western men in marrying a Russian woman does not seem to fade. The demand is still there; consequently, so are the scams. If you go to a search engine and type in "Russian women," scores of sites will show up promising you the quickest road to domestic bliss with a sexy-accented beauty. This means anyone new to the process has to somehow learn to swim in this ocean of information.

The first thing I would recommend to someone wishing to try meeting and possibly marrying a Russian woman is not to rush into joining a dating site / agency.

Look for unbiased, preferably first-hand information and read as much of it as you can find. Learn about contemporary Russian and Soviet culture. Learn about dating agencies. Educate yourself about scams. Learn what you will need to do in order to bring the lady over to your country (the immigration process is one huge and costly headache). A whole different subject is how the lady will adjust to her new life in the new country; this is something both the man and the woman are often completely unprepared for.

I would say 90% of disaster stories I hear took place because of lack of knowledge / preparation, both on the man's and the woman's side.

There are plenty of books and e-books on the subject. I will mention two e-books I have personally read and found helpful. One is How To Find And Marry A Girl Like Me by Elena Petrova. Even though Elena is a well known agency owner, the book is free of typical dating agency hype. Elena, who had married a "Western" man herself and emigrated from Russia, shares her own story first and then proceeds to advise men on how to go about meeting a Russian woman - from writing your first letter to planning a trip to Russia and meeting your lady in person.

The other e-book, Wanna Marry a Russian Woman? Have Her Read This First by Lydia Johnson, is meant to prepare both the woman and the man for what they will face after she comes to the US (the book is in English with a Russian translation so that men can send it to their bride to be). You will be amazed at what misconceptions many Russian women have about life in the United States (Canada, and the rest of the "Western" world) and how many issues you both will have to deal with while she adjusts to it.

Another good source of information is RWGuide.com. Do not get sidetracked by all the photos and videos of women you will see there, go straight to Articles. They cover everything under the sun: scams, correspondence, translation services, trips to Russia, cultural differences, Russian customs, visas, immigration, you name it. There's days worth of reading on that site, most of it very helpful.

I will end my article with this: if, after you've done all that reading, you are not so sure whether you want to bring over a Russian wife anymore, that's okay. This adventure is not for everyone. I would think it is better to educate yourself on the subject and make an informed decision whether or not you wish to pursue it than rush into it and end up with life-long regrets.

Published by John Harmon

Commercial pilot  View profile

1 Comments

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  • Jeff Musall6/23/2008

    I do like the resources you mention, and you are right, it's not for everyone. But if you think it is, there is a point where you just have to "go for it." I did, and in 2004 married a wonderful woman from Ukraine. Best chance I ever took.

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