Be a Better Parent as You Move On

Eight out of ten children that I know are from single parent household. While there is nothing wrong with being raise by one parent, the complication is higher than for say, a normal two-parent home.

Many of these unfortunate events could be avoided, if the parent takes time to carefully plan out his/her life decision when moving on with new partner. Speaking from my own experiences, I can only offer suggestions what would work best.

Take Time to Build Relationship

We all know that it takes time to build any kind of meaningful relationship. The same idea applies to children as well since they need time to process, and get used to the fact that dad/mom has a new person in their life.

Reserve the urge to flaunt your new love interest to your children until you, yourself, definitely know where your relationship is going.

Allow Natural Feelings to Develop

There is nothing worst to your children then being forced to like the parent's new love interest. Just because you love your new partner, doesn't necessarily mean that your children will fall head over heel in love with that particular person either.

It would definitely hold a different result if you insist on bonding too soon. Allow your children to get to know your new partner on their own terms.

Restraint Physical Demands

This should be first priority on any wise person's mind since the law is pretty stiffened on the subject. Remember, your new girlfriend/boyfriend is still a stranger to your children, and the constant: "give her a hug, give her a kiss, or talk to her, or say good-bye to her" from you will not bring on a pleasant response either. It causes resentment!

Develop Quality Time Privately With Your Children

As thrill as having a new person in your life, your quality time with your children should remain sacred. Don't rush to combine these two separate relationships together. Each one should have its own merit at least first, while both sides are still getting to know each other. As mentioned above, not everyone accepts your new person the way you do or enjoy his/her company.

Beware of Your Children's Personality

Fully understood your children's personality is utmost important. You must realize what characteristics your children individually possesses, and work with their personality to your advantage. For example, a shy and quiet child needs a gentler approach to your whole new life style changes. Have patience, and respect for how your child feels!

In a recent disaster that my children's dad brought on to them with his new partner, I understand how my children feel, and lay down the above suggestions to him. Not only his new relationship affects him, it also affects his children, and how he handles the circumstances as well.

I am happy to report that these ideas have improved the situation between all involved parties.