Become a Nascar Driver: Do You Wanna Race?

If you have ever wanted to become a NASCAR driver then you need to make sure and hone your skills. We all know that you have to be a good driver, extremely lucky, and be best of friends with Dale Jr. But if you are going to take the sport seriously you need to make sure and possess these super power abilities.

1. An inability to turn right. If you can turn right at all then you cannot be a champion NASCAR driver. Tracks are only made to be ran in one direction. Right hand turns are few and far between on the NASCAR circuit so make sure and perfect your ability to turn left and don't worry about turning right. While you're at it, make sure and forget how to back up and put your car in reverse.

2. Possess the last name of Gordon, Busch, or Johnson. Seems like everyone who wants to become a NASCAR Driver has one of these last names. It helps if you have a brother with the same last name who wants to be a driver also. Make sure if you want to be a champion though that you are named Gordon or Johnson, reckless but good drivers tend to have the last names of Busch, Newman, or Harvick.

3. Have at least one friend named Joe Bob. Only a true southerner can become a NASCAR Driver and every good southerner has at least one friend named Joe Bob, Jimbo, or Bobby Joe. It helps if this friend has extra special mechanical ability and they can become your crew chief. If your friend Jim Bob doesn't know much about cars never fear you can always make him your gas can catch man.

4. Have the uncanny ability to promote products. Have you ever seen a NASCAR driver on TV when they weren't drinking a carbonated beverage. In order to become a NASCAR driver one must be able to endorse at least 7 products in one sentence. This skill also requires one to possess an excellent memory. It would be terrible for a Nascar driver to forget one of their 250 associate sponsors. Don't forget the little guy.

5. Have and maintain several speeding tickets. Have you ever seen a slow NASCAR driver? Of course not! In order to become a NASCAR driver one must have the maximum number of speeding tickets allowed without losing your drivers licenses. Along with a lead foot it also helps to have one of those cool bumper stickers on the back of your car that says "I'm not tailgating I'm qualifying".

6. Live or move to Charlotte, NC. Even if you weren't born in North Carolina never fear you still have an outside shot to become a NASCAR Driver. Though it is rare, a few people outside of the Carolinas have actually become pretty good drivers. When first moving to Charlotte make sure and look for a house or trailer home within 5 miles of the speedway so that you can be readily accessible on race day.

7. Become good friends with a life insurance salesman. It doesn't take a genius to figure out that people who make a living driving vehicles 200 mph in a quarter mile circle tend to be dare devils. While it is true that when you first become a NASCAR driver you won't have a lot of money you need to purchase as much life insurance as possible. One helpful hint though, make sure and never tell your insurance agent that you are a NASCAR driver. They may just cancel your policy.

So there you have it. To become a NASCAR driver just follow these few simple steps and you will be well on your way to fame and fortune. Good luck.