Bed Wetting: Facts, Treatments and Misconceptions

The social stigma, and embarrassment of bed wetting ( known as urinesis) in children lead many parents to ignore a problem that has the potential to cause , emotional, psychological and medical problems in their children. By hiding this problem parents place their children at risk to develop real problems later in their lives.

The Facts About Bed Wetting

Studies show 15% of all children have bed wetting problems past the age of three years old. Doctors state that 3 years old is the normal age range for children to develop normal bladder control and to begin staying dry throughout the night. Most children will stop bed wetting by the time they reach puberty, rarely does the behavior continue into the teens, so time is on their side and bed wetting is more common than people may think, more than five million children in the United States continue to wet the bed past the age of 6, according to the National Kidney Foundation.

Punishment is not the cure for bed wetting, in fact punishing, or degrading a child for persistent bed wetting can have the complete opposite effects that parents intend. Parent's need to realize that punishing the child for something that he or she has no control over causes stress and anxiety, not to mention a sense of insecurity. These are believed to be common causes of bed wetting themselves and hamper any attempts to cure the problem. Punishment just makes it worse.

Imagine what it must be like for a child, to go to bed every night in fear of waking up with a wet sheet beneath them. Knowing, should they have a wet night, that punishment and ridicule face them in the morning. Severe self esteem issues are very common in bed wetting children, they tend to be extremely introverted and self deprecating. This can be directly related to the parents handling of the child regarding the bed wetting.

There is overwhelming evidence that bed wetting is a hereditary problem, parents pass it on to their children. This of course is not always the case but the child of a parent who suffered from chronic bed wetting is much more likely to be a bed wetter themselves. Studies being done currently are linking bed wetting to a genetic problem that is passed down the family tree from parent to child.

What Parents can do to Help Their Child

There are many ways that a parent can help their children overcome the problem of bed wetting. As stated before punishment is not one of them. Positive reinforcement from a parent could be all the difference needed to help a child maintain a healthy level of self esteem and self respect.

Teaching the child's siblings to understand the problems that their brother or sister has, and making it known that using the problem as a weapon in sibling rivalries, is absolutely unacceptable and will be met with punishment , is also a very important thing to do. When a sibling that does not wet the bed uses bed wetting as a platform for attacking his brother or sister this causes the child to feel inferior to the sibling and that can lead to many other problems.

Having your children do bladder strengthening exercises has been shown to be an effect means of gaining a hold on bed wetting. children can strengthen the muscles that control their bladders by holding it in for as long as they can be fore going to the bathroom. Like any exercise this gradually makes the bladder muscles stronger and expands the bladder itself allowing it to hold more urine.

Repeating the words "wake up you need to go to the bathroom",(not out loud of course) over and over while holding it in also teaches the brain to recognize when the bladder is full and to wake themselves up in the night.

Parents can limit the amount of fluid intake that their child has after 6p.m. This has been found to be a very effective method of treatment. With less urine being made the bladder will have less work to do to contain it.

Positive reinforcement is a necessity. If your child has a dry night them reward them for it. It's odd that parents are swift to punish their children when they do wrong, yet they rarely praise them when they do right. Let your child know that he/she is not abnormal, that there are many other children in the world with the exact same problem. Help them to believe that this is not a lifelong problem and that it will go away.

Waking your child up at different intervals throughout the night and having them go to the bathroom will dramatically cut down on the number of wet nights and gives them a feeling of accomplishment. This also goes along way towards ending the bed wetting problem, giving them confidence in themselves that there is going to be a time when this is gone for good.

Treatments also involve wetness alarms, these alarms attach to the child's pajamas or under the sheet. They make noise or give a mild eclectrical; shock to the child at the first sing of moisture waking the children up so that they can relieve themselves. Many people are not big fans of these devices as they can frighten the child into evacuating their bladders and negating the whole purpose of the alarm in the first place.

There are many different varieties of moisture absorbent underwear on the market for children. These can be used when a child has is going to have a sleepover or has to go to overnight camps. These can be put on discreetly and will keep the child from having to face the embarrassment, and teasing of their peers should an accident occur.

There are several prescribed medications currently on the market that are being used to control bed wetting. Examples of medications used include anti-diuretic hormone nasal spray and the anti-depressant medication Imipramine. They have had limited success.

Although rare, there are cases where the parents , pediatricians, and physicians cannot help with the problem. Then it may be wise to seek the advice of a child or adolescent psychiatrist, to evaluate potential emotional problems. This is especially true in cases where the child starts bed wetting after a long period of dry nights or when it was never a problem before. If the child is persistently sad or over emotional for instance, after the loss of a loved one or a divorce. Anything that may have been overly traumatic emotionally can cause a child to start wetting the bed.

It is always best to contact your physician, if for nothing else than the piece of mind that they can provide, as bed wetting may be a symptom of a serious medical problem., including but not limited to: kidney problems, a urinary tract infection, constipation, bladder infections, diabetes, or severe stress. The number of potential problems are many.

The Myth's and Misconceptions

Common misconceptions surrounding bed wetting are many. For a long time it was thought to be something that the child was doing on purpose to get back at their parents or to gain attention. This led to children being punished for their misbehavior.
It is important to remember that children rarely wet the bed on purpose, the fact is that children do not want to feel abnormal and want very much to please the people around them

Children do not wet the bed because they are lazy, they simply do not recognize that they need to go to the bathroom.

WHat you may not know.

There is a scientifically proven correlation between bed wetting and Pyromania, ( the uncontrollable need to see or start fires) and 84% of known serial killers are reported to have been bed wetters as children. Psychologist use bed wetting as one three principal elements for diagnosing antisocial personality disorder. The other two are pyromania and cruelty to animals. Dr, John MacDonald developed a study known as the MacDonald triad, using the three elements above as early warning signs of a budding serial killer. in his article, "The Threat to Kill" in the American Journal of Psychiatry.

It is believed that the problems encountered by children who wet the bed lead them to have low self esteem, hostility and, a general lack of caring for the feelings of the people around them. These are all contributing factors in Antisocial personality Disorder

Being a childhood bed wetter myself, I know first hand the feelings that a child has when dealing with this problem, constant punishment and embarrassment leaves a child feeling all alone. If you have a child or children that have a bed wetting problem seek help for the child. There are very helpful organizations devoted to understanding and treating this problem. Remember always that it is not their fault and they need to feel love and support to help them break free of the bed wetting curse.

Here are a few places to seek help:
http://www.goodnites.com/na/index.asp A great site, that is loaded with information and help programs, They even have a forum to discuss issues with other parents of bed wetting children and professionals in the treatment of bed wetting. Best of all its free.
http://aacap.org/page.ww?name=Bedwetting§ion=Facts+for+Families America Academy of Child and Adolescent Psychiatry.