Benedict Arnold Meets His Sports Audience

Where do I start to describe the enterprise (ESPN) without embarrassing the band of brothers at ESPN, the sports broadcasting network. They have occupied my attention the entirety of their 32 year existence. As a matter of fact they were formed (YES, ACTUALLY FORMED) to deal with the problem child who is me--Tommy Hayfield.

Yes, this humble--very humble-- sports writer is actually highly desired and sought after by television producers across the country, but ESPN has first dibs at me it has been said and therein lies the story. They have a core band of brothers,if you will, who are cloistered and defensive of any solution which brings me in the broadcast door to reality...reality is where I'm not by virtue of their intense interest in reducing their culpability in keeping me out of the public spotlight.

I could name my price it has been said since I draw--or would draw--huge revenues by drawing huge audiences--to the network of the half-witticism. I didn't say they were half wits. Well, I guess I'll say it. You can't do this forever...your dad wherever he is wants to know why you can't straighten up your act. We ALL want to know why you can't get your shifts together.

Morning noon, and night shifts at ESPN in Connecticut have the responsibility of harnessing me and they choose to do it by highlighting their own audience-self-defeating maneuvers. For example, Colin Cowherd has NO talent for television and yet he has a show which is a charity by all appearances...is he crippled. My apologies to crippled kids, but Colin is a charity unto himself as is Mike Tirico who has been raised above his ability to deliver to announcer on Monday night football. He is suspicious of his audience and is suspicious of more talented people namely Ron Jaworski and John Gruden. We're all--as football fans-- a bit suspicious of his disguise.

The core band of brothers continues with familiar faces to sports fans; they are the sportscasters who deliver the news in a kitchy kind of way..they are sort of saying we don't have talent and please don't look at me. Sometimes I just want the scores and that's how I deal with the inanity of the sports delivery device which is ESPN.

Look for a video opinion/editorial of the fountain of continuously and amazingly ridiculous attempts of signing me to a contract which would inevitably result in a HUGE raise for them. Don't you want a raise. I think we're talking about going to a more intrusive tax bracket now.

Politics is NEVER far away from the band of brothers!