Benefits of single motherhood

While you might already know what it means to be a single parent, some days you might have trouble seeing the bright side of being a single mother. There are days when you want to rip your hair out and go on an endless search for that thing we call sanity. There are days when you take long showers so you can cry without your child seeing it. So, let's just take a minute to think about the reasons that all those times are worth it. After all, there are some elements of being a singe mom that just can't be beat!

You're the boss. Being the parent and being the boss at all is actually an illusion, but being a singe mom is as close as it gets. If you don't believe me about it being an illusion, just think about who got their way when you were trying to sleep at one in the morning and your baby decided he was hungry. Being a single mom means you don't have to sacrifice what you think is important to please a grown man. I mean, I love men, but I'm not sure who pouts more often, boys or grown men!

Embrace womanhood. I love being a woman. If I lived with a man, I'd have to tone that down a bit when I decorate the house and so forth. Don't get me wrong. I do take my son's opinion into consideration, but instead of having to argue with a guy about what goes on the walls, I just watch my son give me the eye roll and hang up his own deco right next to mine. And when it comes to chic flicks, well what do you think I use when I want my son to unplug for a bit? Put in a chic flick and see how fast your son runs out the front door!

Raise men to treat women right. There are times when being a single mom trying to raise a boy into a man can be a trying experience. After all what do I know about teaching a boy to stand up to use the bathroom? But, through the years, I've learned that I have the ability to make sure my son shows women a good amount of respect. It helps that there isn't a man here to undermine my decisions or disrespect me in front of my son. My son not only gets to see how hard I work to give us a decent life, he also gets to learn that things like how giving a small compliment or opening the door for a woman can go a long way.

No tug of war. It may not always be easy to be the only parent in the house, but I don't have to worry about dividing my attention between my son and a man. Hunter gets my attention whether he wants it or not and anyone I date can either accept that or move on. Meeting and dating someone as a single mom means that my son already exists rather than being with a man who was used to getting all my attention until my son was born. Instead of the man feeling like some of his time was taken when a child was born, the man I date will already know how much time is available.

Financial benefits. Now, I just know that someone is going to read this and wonder when I'm going to mention all the financial benefits that they think all we single moms are offered. Seriously, I can't count the times that someone has told me how much help is out there for single moms and how lucky we are to get child support. Oh, how I wish you could see me roll my eyes at that one! Yes, there is help out there for single moms, but they just about have to be immersed in poverty to be able to qualify for some of them. Those aren't the benefits I'm talking about. I'm talking about the ability to maintain your own finances without worrying that someone else is going to spend them. Yes, two incomes in the house would surely be better than one, but not if one of you is spending an income and a half!

Make your own schedule. I have to admit that I used to love cooking dinner for a man, knowing that it was expected at a certain time. On the other hand, since it's just my son and I, we get to make the schedule and determine what we want. The only glares I get over not making a meal someone else wants happen to come from a 10-year-old that is devoted to macaroni and cheese. So no, I don't feel bad about not making what he wanted.

Don't get me wrong, two parent families do have their perks. For myself though, being a single mom offers a level of freedom and pleasure that I don't think I would have if there was a man in the house. I get to celebrate every accomplishment my son has with no interference or jealousy from anyone else and I get to do it knowing that I was there every step of the way. As a mom, I just can't ask for any more than that. As a woman, I'm happy to be able to just be myself with no pretenses.

References: Personal experience