Beyond the Registry: Getting the Gifts You Need at Your Baby Shower

Gift registries are a novel idea. You simply pick out the things you both like and need for your baby, and then you send a note in your invitations that says "registered at X store." Simple enough, right?

Not really. There are several problems with gift registries that most soon-to-be moms never consider. First, the store you choose may not be convenient for all of your guests. Second, most moms go crazy with scanning items, leading to a registry that's overwhelming to most of their guests. Most people don't have time to stand around the store searching through a list of 100 items, trying to discern one from another. Finally, most stores don't print a picture on your registry. This leaves your guests wandering around, looking at scan numbers. It's all very impractical.

So, after you've spent hours and hours picking out the things you want, your baby shower comes and goes, and you didn't get much of what you asked for. Instead, you received thirty baby blankets and enough newborn onesies to supply wardrobes for all of the children born the same day as yours. Now you have to sift through all of these things, trying to determine where they came from. Then, you have to pack it all up and lug it into the store. This is probably the last thing you want to do when you're in your third trimester of pregnancy.

There are better means of getting the things you really need. Read this article for suggestions on how to get the gifts you really need at your baby shower:

Make Your Own List
Instead of relying on the store registry, why not just make your own list and include it in your invitations? Keep it as simple and short as possible. When you're asking for a specific design, include a picture and the exact name of the product. Here's an example of what your list might look like:

1. Bottles: Platex VentAire 8oz. 3-pack
2. Car Seat: Graco Snugride Infant Car Seat - Family Tree
3. Stroller: Graco Family Tree Glider Stroller
4. High Chair: Graco Contempo High Chair - Family Tree
5. Onesies and Sleepers: 3+ Months
6. Bibs
7. Bottle Brush

This is a short example, but it should give you the main idea. It's straightforward, simple, and accessible to any guest shopping at whatever store they choose. Whenever making your list, there are some things you should keep in mind. First, keep it short. The longer the list, the less likely your guests will be to go by it. Second, keep requests for things like clothes and blankets to a minimum. People will inevitably buy these items even when you haven't requested them. Third, don't request specific outfits - you can purchase them yourself. Fourth, request clothing at sizes above newborn. Your child won't wear newborn clothes for very long. Finally, name the store you found your items at so that guests can find them easily if they choose.

Request Gift Cards
This may seem rude, but it can be done in a tactful manner. And if you genuinely distrust your guests' abilities to pick out the things you want, this may be your best option. The way you do this is to have a note in your invitations that appears to be from whoever is throwing your shower. Have that person write something like "Because mother is so picky about what she wants her little one to have, I'd suggest simply buying her gift cards instead of gifts." This way it doesn't seem as though you are requesting them, and the humor implicit in the idea of mom being "picky" will override any offence your guests might take. However, if you still feel that your guests will be offended, you have one more option.

Request Receipts
And you don't even have to request the receipt as much as simply requesting a note stating where the gifts were purchased. In your invitations, simply request that people make a note of where they purchased their gifts either in their card or on their gift bag. This will make it easier to decide where you need to return things, and guests shouldn't mind performing such a menial favor. You can also take this one step further.

Name a Preferred Store
Simply state the store you'd like to have your gifts bought from in your invitation. This doesn't force your guests to shop there, it simply requests it. This may make the returning process easier because most of your gifts should come from one place. And, if people haven't named the store they bought their gifts from, you can simply attempt to return them there anyway.

If you follow these suggestions, you should have a much better chance of getting the gifts you really need at your baby shower. Additionally, you'll be making things easier on your guests. No one wants to give a gift that will be promptly returned, so guide them to getting what you'll cherish.