Birthday Jitters: Give and Survive the Best Birthday Party Ever

The words "birthday party" strike fear into the hearts of many a parent, but it doesn't have to be this way. You don't have to hire a better band, rent a bigger bouncer, or give more favors. Your child's birthday party can be fun and memorable with a minimum of expense. Of course, a venue party, like a pizza place, arcade or skating rink, is always an option. Kids enjoy activity parties and the venue does all the work. Some of us, however, have a demented desire to do the work ourselves. This article is for us.

First, set a budget. I have a large family and most of our birthday parties are around $100 at most. You can put on a good party for less, especially if you limit the guest list.

Step two is to decide who the guests will be. I like to invite the entire class for the first year or two of school. Friendships at this age are fluid and setting a precedent of including everyone is always a good thing. When kids are older, they will settle with a more intimate group of friends, and the guest list will pare itself down.

Choose your location and your theme. I always allow my children to choose once they can talk, so cartoon characters rule much of the time. Plan the activities. For a party from 1.5 to 2 hours long you'll need about 3 games or activities, plus cake and time to open gifts. It's good to have an extra activity up your sleeve, in case the kids blow through them too quickly. Match the activities to the theme. Many traditional party games can be tweaked to fit your theme. Pin the tail on the Donkey becomes Put the Bat Signal on the Moon (Batman party), or Mr. Funnybones has lost his Funny Bone (Monster party), or Pin the S on Superman. A treasure hunt can be a hunt for the Cinderella's glass slipper for a princess party, or a coffin full of candy for the above mentioned Monster party, or even find and rescue Superman, trapped by kryptonite (green glow stick makes wonderful kryptonite). Use your imagination. Some of these games will require some work on your part, so make sure you plan for that. If time is short, choose games that don't require a lot of preparation.

Now, the cake. Whether you make it yourself or order it from a bakery depends entirely on your budget, your schedule, and whether you enjoy trying to decorate it yourself. Some party themes lend themselves well to decorate your own cupcakes-put out small bowls of colored frosting with candies and sprinkles. This can double as an activity. For a camping party, we've also done make your own trail mix in lieu of favors.

Unless you have a large budget, skip the decorations. Kids won't notice them anyway. Something else you can do without are themed plates, cups and napkins. For a huge savings, you can buy solid colored plates, napkins and cups that coordinate with the theme. Favor bags can be made from plain paper lunch bags with themed stickers.

One final thing-party favors. A few pieces of candy or small toys are adequate. Instead of buying the overpriced toys on the party favor aisle, try hitting the toy aisles. Most stores have a display of very inexpensive toys. Favors can be distributed in a variety of ways. They may be incorporated in the games. My own kids think it's illegal to have a party without a piñata. If guests don't fill their own treat bags as part of a game, you can have them prefilled to hand out at the end of the party.

You're ready to send out invitations. If your children are in the early grades, it's considered good form to either invite the entire class or send them by mail, to avoid those who aren't invited feeling left out. It's a very good idea to put an end time for the party. I advise setting that time for about half an hour before you really want to be done with the party, because some parents will always be late. Now, go out there and throw a party to remember, without busting your budget.