Black Heart

I am in a fight against myself
At war with the thoughts in my head
I wonder how much longer I can last
Before I finally end up dead

When the thoughts turn depressing
And the tone becomes despair
I try to change the direction
But sometimes I just don't care

I sometimes find myself adrift
Trying to understand it all
Day after day of struggles
There must be a pending fall

As time passes on like it always will
My heart slowly turns to gray
And with even more passing of time
I may find my heart black one day

I guard my heart with an iron fist
My soul I buried in steel
At the right times I smile and laugh
But inside I don't really feel

Everyone thinks they know me
I've tried to set them straight
They don't hear a word I say
Which only fuels the hate

One day it will not be like this
I will eventually find my own way
Or at least that is what I hope
As I begin another day