Black an Whtite Together

Why Can't We Be Friends?

Cherrie Webb
I have been in a multi--ethnic relationship for more than twenty years. I love my husband dearly and have no plans to leave our marraige. I am often asked why I feel offended when I see Black men in relationships with white women. It's complicated. A black woman's problem with black men, MY problem with these couples is difficult.

I feel that Black men reject their mothers, sisters, neices... On talk shows and in print, they have nothing good to say about black women. In contrast, I still see black men as attractive. Black women hardly ever disrepect Black men or reject them, we simply say we were looking and found the qualities we needed in our mates. For most of us, Black or white doesn't matter, It's about treating us with respect and dignity.

As for white women, there too many reasons that I am bothered by them. The main thing that makes my dreds stand on end is when I see a white woman acting like she thinks a black woman would behave. They don't see the multi-faceted nature of Black women. It's as though they are pretending that they are black, ironically, the one thing that the black men are running away from when they hook up. Another issue is something I call the "Droppin' It Like It's Hot". That's when a black woman struggles with Black men when either is too poor to buy dirt. As soon as he makes it in the real world, he drops the black woman and gets a white trophy.

I know , this is the new millenia and we're all supposed to be enlighted, open and accepting. If this was any place other than Oklahoma, I would be inclined to believe it. But this is Oklahoma and people here think different. There's something off about a native born Oklahomans. They're wired differently. The antebellum South is still here, alive and well. No gays, no interracial dating, nothing but Christian and alway vote Republican. If you can adopt this mentality, you can survive in Oklahoma. Most Oklahomans that I know believe that interracial dating or marriages are sins against nature. (Yes, this was mentioned to me a week or so ago.) That's just pathetic.

People stare at us when we're out so I made business cards with our picture on it and on the back it says "Here you go, it'll last longer". Another couple that we know says that they aren't fluent in Idiocy, could you please speak in English without rationalization? It's an odd feeling to get these reactions when we are home, but the rest of the world doesn't have a problem or at least they are respectful in our presence. We are still in the dark ages here.

Let me state that being in an interracial marriage and admonishing Black men with white women is ironic. I can't help it. It's just who I am. I don't belittle those people. What I don't like is the hatred exuded by Black men towards Black women. They treat there white women better than they would their own mother. How anyone that respects their woman not the realtive have serious issues . To use the Blask struggle to , for what, a different history,

Text even tells us that paradise lies the at the foot of our mother. Love and repect your parents. I fail to understand how any one can give more their flavor than the womb that bore him.Black people wake up. Cheak your weapons, the revolution won't be televised

Published by Cherrie Webb

A prolific writer, Muslim homeschooling mother of five, I see to keep it real on all levels. Learn about my loves, hates, political views and what helps a DIVA survive in this world. I discuss family, frien...  View profile

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