Blow Her Away on Mother's Day

I can give you ideas on how to make your wife feel special on Mother's Day, but the key most important single ingredient for this recipe of success is for you to figure out what your wife's "love language" is, if you haven't figured it out already.

This may shock you guys out there -- it shocked me when I first learned this -- but not every woman likes gifts. In fact, many prefer acts of service or deep conversation instead of a box of chocolate and a bouquet of flowers.

Here's what I suggest.

Ask your wife now what she would like for Mother's Day. Indicate to her that the possibilities are wide open (and hope she's reasonable about the budget). If she doesn't know, or if she says, "Oh the usual," then here are some possibilities with which you can approach her.

Perhaps she would enjoy a "day out," alone or with her friends. It seems to me that many dads get time alone, and wives don't have that opportunity as often. Dads, you're certainly capable of cooking, cleaning, and doing laundry -- and playing with the kids -- while the wife gets a relaxing day out somewhere.

Or perhaps she would enjoy a relaxing "day in," at home alone while Dad and the kids are out doing something elsewhere.

She may rather have a family day -- time spent together working on a project or simply having fun together.

Breakfast in bed is usually a nice touch! And this doesn't have to be only on Mother's Day. Perhaps you want to give her a hand-drawn certificate now to tell her that she will have breakfast made for her, by Dad and the kids, once a week for every week between now and Mother's Day.

Wives love "service coupons." Dads, you and the kids can produce hand made coupons offering various acts of service -- anything from scrubbing the kitchen floor to washing sheets to making the beds to making dinner. If these are already things that you (Dads) do, then do more! No wife in her right mind is going to turn out voluntary help.

Make a "Love You Calendar" for your wife. Get a sheet of paper. Dads, you and the kids can each write an entry each day that describes something you love about her.

Write cards and letters. Make the extra effort this year to take the Mother's Day card you always give her and to mail it so that she receives it in time for Mother's Day. In this day and age of email, it is special to receive a real letter in a real mailbox. You may even be able to write your own poem; you'll certainly be able to find good poetry on your favorite freelance writing site!

Don't do chocolate and flowers. At least that's what she'll probably tell you.

But don't forget the chocolate and flowers. I'd recommend giving her a small package of her favorite chocolates, in private, so that she doesn't have to share them with anybody. And while she says she doesn't want you to buy flowers, she would love wearing a corsage or showing off a nice bouquet on the dinner table.

If you have a way to record onto tape or CD, you may want to make a "Mother's Day Album" featuring your kids reciting some appropriate poetry and singing songs. That is a gift she will cherish always.

Are you musically inclined? And (more important) does she enjoy whatever music you perform? Perhaps you can compose a song just for her and then perform a mini recital on Mother's Day.

Spend time doing what she wants. Doesn't it really come down to this -- how much time are you willing to give someone else? That's about as good an indicator of love as anything. Slow down and take the time to listen to her, talk with her, and get to know her again. If you can accomplish only this item before Mother's Day, she'll feel like the most special woman on the planet.

All right guys, let's get started!