Blueprint: Greatest TV Sitcom of All Time

It's hard to admit, but every day I see the truth becomes just a tad bit clearer. Instead of taking a spork to my retina to block out the visions, I might as well own up to it right now. Ladies and gentlemen, the sitcom is dead.

Many say it's been six feet under for quite some time now. The CBS crowd)who I never see walking around in public for some reason) say it's alive and well, and people should stop complaining and enjoy these shows for what they are. I hate that "Resistance is futile!" mentality.

After watching TV Land for a week researching the history of this once renowned format of comedic entertainment, I've come to the conclusion that the end must come in order to same the masses. By end I mean Omega. By Omega I mean the end all beat all of whatever I'm talking about when using the word "Omega."

By combining elements form older, successfully classic sitcoms, I plan on creating the greatest half hour(kid friendly) television program in existence. It was a fairly simple formula to come up with. I'm confident that once this show is made and four seasons are produced, it will force all competitors to "reinvent the wheel" instead of leaning on old and tired cliches that have become a staple of the sitcom.

I call this Omega Cliche.

Plot: A family is stranded on a deserted island... And none of them knows why. This will never be explained to either the audience, or the shows cast members. A sense of mystique adds a ton of intrigue to even the lamest ideas. Plus, islands and television go together like overpaid CEO's getting a bonus and a bad economy.

Central focus: Single dad, and his two daughters.Sympathy for a single parent should automatically hook a lot of viewership for the first five episodes. This being a dude raising to girls makes writer's jobs that much easier. You could spend the first two seasons with the dad nervously going over the birds and the bee's(using two coconuts), and have the laugh track play full stop.

Wildcard: Insane/misunderstood in law. Loving and caring family member who just want's to look out for the kids' best interest, or blatant plot device that somehow always prevents the family form being rescued whenever a helicopter flies over the island? That's for the viewer to decide.

Last but not least, there should be a no shortage of cr-r-r-razy predicaments! What kind of silly, impossible, jump the shark worthy situations could this motley crew get themselves into? Anything involving the Harlem Globetrotters and broken elevators should do nicely.

How can there be an elevator on a deserted island, and what do the Globetrotters have to do with any of this? Don't know, that's what makes it crazy!