Body Image

I do not believe in dieting and for the better part of 20 years, I rejected the notion that every body needs to strive to be thin. After years of yo-yo dieting, I was fortunate to realize that the problem was not with how I looked but how this culture looks at a woman of my size. I initially received validation for my size from an organization local to where I lived, "The Body Image Task Force" Santa Cruz. I also took a course called "Women the Earth and the Journey of the Heroine" and learned about Goddess images archetypes as very large women, like the Venus of Willendor.

As a large woman, I have always exercised regularly, and for years have maintained a nearly flawless diet; to just about every doctor's baffling amazement, my heart rate and blood pressure have always been perfect for my age and my cholesterol exceptionally low.

I have also maintained a lifelong curiosity of why our culture is so youth obsessed and aging is considered a curse.

How Did Food Become the Enemy?

In this culture, we have made the luxury of having numerous food choices a negative and the privilege of being able to eat is often unappreciated. While families starve the world over, this nation is worried about the latest promise of a pre-pubescent thin body, the likes of which few folks are naturally.

Since food has tragically become the enemy, the way that we eat is off balance. We have become disconnected with the needs of our bodies, often unable to distinguish appetite from hunger. The reality is that healthy whole foods can produce a healthy glow, throughout our lives, that no plastic surgeon could ever do any justice.

Dispelling BMI Myth

Perhaps the most deplorable myth is the Body Mass Index. I emphasize this since I believe that most folks may take it to heart, panic and take drastic measures to lose weight or risk gastric bypass. BMI only takes into account a person's height and weight- to call it a body mass index is inaccurate since the height and weight are not complete indicators of our body mass. A person's height is not the only criteria for body mass- muscle mass, frame, sex; natural proportions also play a role. For example, let us say that two individuals who are both 5'9'' have different weights. Person A does not exercise and eats unhealthy food has almost no muscle mass, a naturally small frame and a fast metabolism. Person B works out regularly with a weight-training program, has heavier muscle mass, has a slower metabolism, a larger frame and eats healthy for the most part. Person A and Person B are both, according to body mass index, expected to weigh between 128-162 pounds to be considered at a "normal" weight. Both person A and Person B have drastically different health habits, yet it is more likely that Person A, whose habits are far less healthy, to have a weight in the "normal" range.

Using myself as an example, according to the BMI chart I am right in the middle of the obese range, halfway to supposed morbid obesity and am at great risk for health problems. As mentioned and extensively test by my doctor, I have no health problems at age 42 even though I have apparently according to BMI charts been obese since puberty. I have not been at the BMI normal range since before puberty when I was by any standard skinny.

Furthermore, BMI charts have no indication of what constitutes being underweight, which can have serious health consequences. Isn't preventing anorexia as important as morbid obesity?

Statistical Misconceptions

The medical professional and health insurance carriers boast that large "overweight" people have higher blood pressure due to statistics. These stats don't take into consideration the ridicule that large folks experience when trying to exercise, that which is proven to promote a healthy heart rate and blood pressure. {See my article "Fat can be Fit"}

So what can one do to know if they are healthy even if they are supposedly dangerously "overweight?" As a healthy large person, who is not a physician I suggest simple common sense. An individual knows their body best so it is important to ask yourself if you feel physically comfortable in your body. If one is active, has a healthy blood pressure level, resting heart rate, low cholesterol, are not hypothyroid and are not afflicted with diabetes (it is not proven what actually causes diabetes, even if it is commonly blamed on a person's weight) or any other major health issues chances are being large is not a problem, however this ought to be confirmed by a physician- ideally one who does not discriminate against large people and does not assume large people are unhealthy. This is difficult to find, which can be frustrating for many of us.

Exercise and Body Image

Safe and healthy exercise has always had a profound impact on my body image. When I exercise I enjoy my body and afterwards I feel more comfortable and beautiful in my body. I feel an increase in body awareness when I exercise promotes. Maybe the act of exercising makes me feel strong, empowered and capable.

Perhaps the best means of exercise that promotes a positive body image for me is Bellydance. Middle Easter style and Oriental dance is for everyone, of all sizes and young and old. However, Bellydance has special benefits for the large woman; not only are the belly dance steps hospitable to the large form, but also extremely beautiful on a full-bodied woman. Furthermore, my belly dance teacher placed special emphasis on body image in her approach to teaching and marketing.

Fear of Aging

I pondered since childhood why looking young is a pre-occupation with so many people. People spend billions on plastic surgery and many go into debt to live up to a standard, outside once own self, of what it means to be attractive. I have asked myself what is at the root of this and I believe my insights make good sense. In this culture, we fear death to such an extreme that we have decided that looking old, closer to death, is not attractive and worship youth, further from death. The reality is that death comes to all people and does not pass over folks who have reversed their physical signs of the aging process.

Personally, as a highly visual person, can tell when someone has had plastic surgery and I think it is hideous. I have also heard stories of nature overpowering nips and tucks- in reality as we age gravity sets in and will catch up to any efforts to defy it. Furthermore, looking younger by altering the aging process does not change most of the realities of aging- loss of independence, incontinence, hearing loss, eye sight loss, ect.

Body Image and Culture

One of the most important aspects of body image is the United States obsession with and promotion of the unattainable thin, "perfect", toned, young body. If we show signs of age, we may be rejected in some circles; if we are large, we experience social rejection and even ridicule from strangers. It is important to realize that this attitude is shallow and superficial. I may experience rejection and ridicule from many people, but are these people worth knowing and being accepted by? As a maturing large woman, I have come to the point where I often feel bad for my friends who are attractive by mainstream standards. These women have many more problems with relationships, then I do, which I believe has to do with not having a filtering system. My filtering system is that my larger stature is not attractive to folks that are probably not of particular high quality. On the other hand most folks who are attracted to me have intelligence and depth- even if they are fewer and far between.

On the contrary, ancient cultures and contemporary cultures outside the United States worshiped large bodies. Non-US cultures also respect the elderly and consider aging sacred.

Kill Your Television?

Television commercial bombard us with pre-pubescent thin endorsement, fad diets, fat hatred, youth promotion, age "defiance" all of which perpetuate low self image for the aging and larger body types (sometimes even folks who are not large) I have learned to tune out this rhetoric, but for someone who is beginning their journey to self acceptance a TV fast may help.

I welcome any further suggestions on promoting positive body image in the comments section. This does not include dieting or weight loss tips.