Boredom Begone: What to Do When You Have Too Much Free Time
Think you don't have anything to do? Think you have too much free time? Well, think again. You have plenty to do. When you need something to do, do one or more of the following to keep yourself occupied.
- Count the paint bumps on your walls and ceilings.
- Play Connect The Dots with the paint bumps.
- Count and play Connect The Dots with the bumps on your partner.
- Consider mysteries of the English language such as why read is pronounced differently in sentences such as the following: "I read
the newspaper everyday." "I read the newspaper yesterday."
- Wonder how those lamps that you touch on or off distinguish between your hand and, say, a pen.
- Wonder whether lower life forms such as ants will ever evolve into creatures that pay taxes. Imagine: "This is a terrible place to build a
nest. It has high crime, high taxes and poor schools."
- Wonder if any woman could've been good enough for Jesus and how she could have won an argument with him. Could she ever be
right?
- Wonder whether they throw Jesus a birthday party in Heaven on December 25 or whenever he was actually born. (Some historians
doubt he was actually born that day.)
- Wonder how people discovered certain creatures were edible. Did someone say, "M-m-m-m. That's a mighty tasty looking cow."?
- Wonder why the rather meek mystic George Harrison was the only Beatle to date or marry attractive women--for one, his wife and the namesake of his friend Eric Clapton's love song "Layla."
- Wonder whether extraterrestrial intelligent beings exist and wonder about their sexual practices, food, music, liquor and
pornography.
- Consider Madonna's going from her Erotica book and her "Truth or Dare" concert tour performances to Kabbalah and writing
children's books.
- Wonder whether odors are universally good or bad or whether some people on this planet actually like foot odor.
- Wonder why some people such as yours truly have a knack for picking the slow aisles in supermarkets.
- Imagine everyone in the world going nuts simultaneously.
- Wonder whether humans will someday be able to communicate by mental telepathy as they now do by phones. Imagine: "Can I call
you back? I have to take this call." "We have a conference call scheduled for 10:30 tomorrow morning."
- Imagine how this would affect phone companies.
- Wonder what people who've been born blind dream about and what arouses them.
- Wonder why full, round butts and large breasts arouse so many of us.
- Wonder whether sleeping mammals such as cats and dogs dream and what they dream about.
- Wonder where George Bush Jr. and others like him would be without their families' wealth and connections.
- Wonder when The United States will be "ready" for a black, Latino, racial other or female president.
- Wonder why someone doesn't tell Osama Bin Laden and other terrorist leaders, "If you're so mad at them why don't you do it
yourself?"
- Consider whether world conflicts would be better settled by boxing matches.
- Wonder how harming innocent, unarmed civilians makes you courageous and right with God.
- Wonder whether deceitful people lie in their sleep.
- Consider the New Thought, the metaphysical, idea that whatever you think, feel or believe becomes and wonder whether believing
you're an automobile will eventually lead you to stock your pantry with oil, gas, coolant, transmission fluid, brake fluid, wiper fluid,
power steering fluid and assorted fluid treatments. Imagine: "Man, I sure could go for an anti-freeze raspa right now."
- Imagine what the world would be like if everyone were like you.
- Write articles such as this one.
Published by Darren Stansbury
Darren Stansbury is a currently single and childless San Antonio native who loves writing and music. These are his only children. In addition to freelance writing he plays keyboards for the blues-rock/experi... View profile
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