Brad Paisley Gets it Wrong with "This is Country Music"

I listened to the album "This Is Country Music" from Brad Paisley. As I listened to the songs I made review notes and you will find them after this introduction. If you want to skip the read and wise-cracks: I did not think much of the album and don't think Brad Paisley has the stuff to be declaring what country music is, or should be, or whatever he may be implying with the title.

"This Is Country Music": A song about all of the topics country music is allowed to cover: like Jesus and cancer, even though people say music isn't supposed to talk about those things. Feels like he is giving country music too much credit for being cutting edge or something, or a "maverick" art, just because rock is dead doesn't mean it isn't still rocking! This slow country guitar and banjo laced track makes sure to add in some patriot soldier is not coming home stuff to really try to pin down the market strong points. By the end he is giving a couple of shout outs to other artists and songs he respects, that is nifty, but the rest of the song is kind of stupid.

"Old Alabama": This song features Alabama and I figured it was going to be a gimmick tribute to them, but I guess they just enter the chorus as the song is about hanging out with his country girl who likes listening to old Alabama music with him. Of course, not being pure shout out gimmick to the bad Alabama doesn't make it any better, treads no new ground, and is crushed by the treads of the generic crap done made and still rolling around, and thus needed to be more gimmicky to stand out: fail.

"A Man Don't Have To Die": A song about how you don't have to die to go to Hell because there is lots of misery on Earth. I admire the bleakness of it, though it almost kicks itself in the crotch as a country song joke.

"Camouflage": A silly ode to camouflage, comedy track all the way, some may giggle.

"Remind Me": A duet with Carrie Underwood and neither one of them really carries the tune. It's about two people reminding each other about where and how many times they had sex or made out.

"Working On The Tan": Beach, surfer dude country jangle that is just plain flat terrible. Brad Paisley trying to high notes sounds like me trying to hit high notes and if you heard that you would understand the severity if the insult I am laying out.

"Love Her Like She's Leaving": The sweet sentiment being sung about comes across more depressing than passionate. Feels like it should be a positive song, yet it's very morose.

"One Of Those Lives": A song about having a crappy day, country song style, he warned us in the opening track of the album, and thus he gives a little boy cancer in the song. Guess he realizes his crappy day is ot as bad as some people's crappy lives. He tries hitting high notes again, sounds like someone getting their scrotum shaved too close.

"Toothbrush": Dopey-dooby-doo music.

"Be The Lake": A song about wishing he was a girl's beach towel or the swimsuit against her body, or the sunshine kissing her skin, or better yet the lake she is swimming in, or perhaps the book left on her boobs when she falls asleep, this feels like a song Peter from "Family Guy" might write.

"Eastwood": You want Western? Well, Clint Eastwood chimes in on this song to tell you: this is Western. Of course he is telling that to some little girl kid or something. Horses galloping in a Western music ensues and you've got yourself a useless piece of instrumental album filler.

"New Favorite Memory": Slow song that is too schmootzy. When he croons the word "moooove" he sounds like cow.

"Don't Drink The Water": This song features Blake Shelton and I believe it was performed on the show "The Voice." The version on the television show was terrible and so is this version. THIS is the country music that makes me hate country music.

"I Do Now": He did not realize how people got to the point where they felt hurt so bad that they would drink in a bar during the day, but he do now. It seems that Brad broke a heart and broke some vows and he'd like to lift a veil and say I do now, repeating what was once a hollow statement on the actual wedding day, but really meaning it now. Actually, a fairly creative concept once it gets to the point. If you can relate to it you may find it a cool track, not completely awful.

"Life's Railway To Heaven": Grab a jug and blow along to this good ole fashion religious themed crap. Poot poot, thump, thump, twangy-bing-yeeeeee-poot.