Bridal Registries: For Better or for Worse?

Either we heard by word-of-mouth, or by receiving the wedding invitation in the mail that someone we know is getting married. How nice. Two people met, fell in love and want to spend the rest of their lives together. We couldn't be happier for the both of them. Such a happy occasion. Our minds start thinking ahead, "What will I wear to the wedding?" "I have to buy a gift." "There will probably be a bridal shower that I'll have to buy a gift for too." "Buying the gifts won't be difficult because they are registered."

Or has bridal registries made gift giving into a nightmare?

Chances are you have eventually browsed through their 1-4 bridal registries, when you have had some free time. Did it then have you thinking as I did, "Whatever happened to the days when you gave a toaster that cost under $10.00 as a gift, or a laundry basket full of household cleaning and laundry supplies?" Whatever happened to the days when the bride-to-be/bride received 3 of the same items and had to go return all but one of them?" "Whatever happened to the days when the bride-to-be/bride was surprised to see what she received as a gift?" Bridal registries took all of that away.

Think about what you saw as you browsed through the bridal registries.

Some of the prices were reasonable and some were downright outrageous. $399.00 for one gift! Oh my! And for that same small appliance that I bought in Kmart for myself for $29.99. $9.99 for a spatula! I just bought one in Walgreens for 50 cents on clearance. Plastic measuring cups for $14.99! I bought a whole set in the Dollar Tree for $1.00. One dinner place setting on the registry is $299.99. Wow! And they need 12 of those. Okay, at least 8. You do the math. $19.99 for one muffin pan. Okay, never mind, it's the Rachel Ray brand. For that price she must come with it to do the baking for you. One wine glass is $24.99. And they are requesting 8 of those. Again, you do the math. $24.99 sounds like a good price for a gift, but how would it look if we just gave one wine glass? It wouldn't look very good. It would look tacky and we would appear to be very cheap.

While I'm on the subject of prices, whatever happened to the day when the recipient didn't know how much you paid for their gift? Now they can look through their own bridal registries and see who spent what. No secrets. Hopefully you bought the gift on sale, or used a store coupon and that they do not know.

On the bridal registry you see individual every day dishes, glasses, utensils.... It has me thinking, "If they need all of this, what are they using now?" How sad, they don't have a dish, or a glass, or a utensil to use until someone buys it for them. Maybe they are thinking they want "special" dishes, glasses, utensils, napkins.... I know they are thinking that when they put that $299.99 place setting for one on their registry. For those of us who have been in this situation, we all know now that there is no such thing as wanting to "save" something, or use only certain items for special occasions. Once we have been in any situation for a length of time it all becomes, we do whatever is less work.

On the bridal registries I see luggage, end tables, a coffee table, lamps, a headboard, a big flat screen television, a bookcase, a dvd player, a camcorder....Oh my. It looks like now we are expected to furnish their whole house, or apartment. 16 candle holders?! I hope they have good fire insurance. A GPS system?! Is that to locate your spouse in your apartment or house? Hmm? Maybe that's the answer to putting a stop to wandering spouses. Alas, less divorces - more happy marriages. A full bed set for $299.99, additional sheets, comforters, pillows, throw pillows, towels.... I hope they have a lot of closets to store everything. They forgot to put a computer, a computer table and a 3-in-1 printer/copier/scanner on the registry. How will we keep in touch?

I've never been married so I've never had a bridal registry. Does that mean I'm expected to furnish my whole house myself? How cruel.

Is there a limit anymore? It appears not. Why not just tell us your color schemes and we'll do the rest. I think overall, it will be easier for me.

Surprise! I hope you like my gift.