Brief Primer on Whiskey: Swimming in the Water of Life

August 1^st marked the 214^th anniversary of the beginning of the Whiskey Rebellion, so it seemed only appropriate to dedicate this month's column to that most American of spirits, whiskey. The Whiskey Rebellion was fought over a ridiculous tax (as though there's another kind) levied on distillers in Pennsylvania and Virginia. The long and short of it was, if your still was on the western side of the mountains you paid a 28% tax on your whiskey but if your still was on the eastern side of the same mountains, you only paid 14%.

Obviously those with a still on the western side were not happy and, on August 1^st 1794, they raised a six thousand-man army to air their grievances. Never one to miss a good fight, then-President George Washington left the White House in the able hands of his VP and led a thirteen thousand-man army with Lighthorse Harry Lee (Robert E. Lee's father) to meet the rebels. To make a long story short, the main instigator of the rebels fled to New Orleans (go figure) and the rebellion was put down with relatively little bloodshed.

So, what is this miracle elixir that has so defined our nation for the past 300 or so years?

"Whiskey" is an ancient Gaelic word meaning, "Water Of Life". In this day and age, though, there are so many different types that one word doesn't seem to cover it. There's whiskey, but then there's also scotch, bourbon, rye, sour mash, single malt, and blended. The best place to begin is at the beginning.

In it's rawest form, whiskey is simply rye or corn mashed and fermented, then stored in oak casks for a number of years. Fresh out of the still, whiskey is clear like vodka. It only takes its amber color after years in the casks. Here in America, it can only be called whiskey if the blend of mashed grains is 51% corn or more. Anything less has to be called rye whiskey.

So, what's the difference between whiskey and bourbon? Location, location, location. In order for a whiskey to be called bourbon, it has to be greater than 50% corn AND it must be distilled in Kentucky. That's why Jack Daniels is called sour mash - it's from Tennessee - while Jim Beam is called bourbon. Same stuff, different state.

Much like bourbon, blended whiskeys are all about location. Anyone blending whiskey must call it just that - blended whiskey - unless it was blended in Scotland, in which case it is scotch. The difference between a blend and a single malt is that a blend is a combination of two or more different whiskeys and a single malt is just one unadulterated distillation.

An interesting side note here. You've no doubt heard the expression "The Real McCoy", but do you know where it comes from? During Prohibition, the market was flooded with cheap scotch imitations, some of them so bad they blinded people. At the time, Joe Kennedy (father of JFK) was a well-known bootlegger. He had in his employ a Scottish boat captain named McCoy who always managed to smuggle in the best stuff. So a common question in East Coast speakeasies at the time was "Is this the Real McCoy?" when ordering scotch.

Now, if you want to look really smart, here's a tip from a bartender. When enjoying a single-malt scotch, never drink it on the rocks. You'll be wasting your money and missing a positively magical experience. Heat a brandy snifter until you can no longer hold it, set the snifter on its side, and then pour the single-malt against the side of the glass until it touches the rim. Set the snifter back upright and add two or three drops of ice water. This will activate the aromatics in the single-malt and will change your life.

Enjoy!