Britney Spears: 10 New Year's Resolutions for 2009 She Must Keep

Zach Golt
One of the most common types of resolutions for which everyone prepares for months in advance starts on January 1: the infamous New Year's resolution! It does not matter whether you are a blue-, white-, red-, purple- or navy-collared worker, because everyone gets their resolutions ready.

The most common resolutions have the words "diet," "workout," "eat healthy," "date more" or "find a husband," but what about celebrities? The celebrities that have everything at their finger tips like personal trainers, dietitians, rehabs, personal stylists and detox centers have it really easy to keep their resolutions in tack? Britney Spears is my all time favorite celebrity because she is the most spontaneous! If Britney personally asked me to give her ten resolution ideas I would. It would be easy for her to stay on a diet, keep in shape and eat healthy because those are things that are penciled into her everyday life because of her father. But as you can see keeping things under father and mother can drive a girl to shave her head.

The first resolution idea I would plead her to keep all year would be for her to keep children in car seats when riding with boys. It was a big scandal when she decided to mount her child on her lap and "get away."

The second resolution I would give her would be for her to decide to grow up because it is pretty great that she has all of these opportunities, but it sucks when she decides to run around in her under wear into the ocean holding hands with her best friend like she is five. I do think that the day she jumped into her celebrity at the age of 2 ½ she stayed two and half.

The third resolution I would give her would be for her to keep a pair of big sunglasses, baseball cap and a wig in the car just in-case she decides to have another spontaneous moment and needs to liberate herself at a barbershop.

The fourth resolution I would give her would be for her to fire her Mom and Dad because everyone knows that you should not mix family with business.

The fifth resolution I would give her would be for her to be a better Mother to her children because she seemed a little confused in 2008 when she was handling her kids with Kevy.

The sixth resolution I would plead her to keep all year would be for her to chose her significant others wisely as she clearly said she made bad decisions when she decided to get into a relationship with her paparazzi boyfriend and backup-dancer. She is pretty spontaneous so she has to keep those things under wraps.

The seventh resolution I would give her would be for her to continue taking classes to increase her vocabulary. I love her to death but her sentence structure is just as good as George W. Bush.

The eighth resolution I would give her would be for her to settle down and not try to forget everything by partying with Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan because we all know how classy they are. My advice would be to celebrate when needed but keep your panties on when things get serious because the paparazzi have sold photographs of britts picakchu to the tabloids.

The ninth resolution I would give her would be for her to try and stay classy because everyone still loves Britt no matter how crazy she gets because she is pops sweetheart.

The tenth resolution I would give her would be for her to KEEP all of the resolutions I just suggested and try to keep her butt in the recording room before Madonna turns her into a Kabala water drinking muscled freak that divorces an awesome husband and starts dating a loser baseball player. Happy New Years Brittany, and stay classy America! I hope that everyone gained some insightful resolution ideas.

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