Britney Spears Overexposed - Literally

Pop diva, Britney Spears, is certainly not acting like a woman who is being countersued for custody of her children. Paris Hilton has suddenly become her bosom buddy, and she has been running around partying like there's no court date in sight. She's been wearing some pretty skimpy outfits but that probably wouldn't even raise an eyebrow if she at least had something on underneath those short short skirts.

Britney's fans, who were overjoyed that their princess dumped Kevin Federline, are now shocked at these scandalous hijinks. There are pleas to act like a mature mother of 2 children. Some fans are making excuses for her - she's had a rough 2 years, let her have some fun. Someone even said she's starting to act like Kevin Federline, meaning running around partying all the time, one supposes. Kevin hasn't been running around waving his magic wand, has he?

On "The View," Rosie O'Donnell invited Britney Spears to live with her, her wife Kelly, and their kids, and begged Britney to ditch her trashy buddies. Just so anyone wouldn't get any ideas, Rosie did qualify her feelings toward Britney as "purely maternal". She not only wants to give Britney some underwear, she wants Victoria's Secrets to give Britney and her gal pals an unlimited supply of underwear, and she's not worried in the least that Britney may be a bad influence on her children. Barbara Walters wanted to know why Britney was doing this.

Well, let's see ...

In spite of the stalwart denials of Britney's and Kevin's attorney that there is no sex tape, maybe ... just maybe ... there is! Maybe Britney ran to Paris for advice on how to survive a sex-tape scandal, because if anyone knows how to do that, it's Paris fer sure. Perhaps the ditzy duo decided that if a strategic upskirt shot or two, or three or even four, appeared prior to a sex tape leak, that would dilute the tape's shock value.

If it does turn out the way, Britney's fans should feel so manipulated ... but they won't. Britney can do no wrong in their eyes. Even if there was a tape of Paris and Britney having a conversation planning this dastardly deed, poor Paris would undoubtedly be skewered alive by Britney fans everywhere. Then Paris would have to make a Federline-type confession that everyone hates her because she dared to befriend their idol.

This is all speculation, of course, and such a foolhardy plan probably would not work anyway. While Brit and Paris might conceivably hope that the reaction to Britney's sex tape would be "but we've already seen her vagina and have no desire to see it again," in reality, the headlines would more likely be "Britney's Upskirt Pics Not Half as Shocking as Hot Hot Video."

On the other hand, perhaps Britney was still miffed about losing her libel suit and Superior Court Judge Lisa Hart Cole's remarks that Britney "put her modern sexuality squarely, and profitably, before the public eye." Maybe the message she's sending is "If you think my sexuality was in the public eye before, what now!"