Broke and Broken

It feels so scary to have no money. When I say no money i mean it. Once upon a time I had plenty of cash to take care of myself and my family. Now, fortunately my wife and kids need no more financial support. I do though. Gone is my million dollar a year business that provided a big salary and benefits, a beautiful suburban home, fancy clothes and cars, expensive trips, fine dining, and restful sleep at night.

Now poverty has replaced all of that. Nightmares, a beaten up old car, cheap eats, several menial jobs to make ends meet, and a two room semi-ghetto apartment.that I am late on the rent for each month. Why did things go so bad?

I still cannot believe that my life has deteriorated to a level where i am about one step away from living on the street. Maybe that would be easier? I am sixty one and climbed the ladder of the self made man. I built my own business from scratch and for twenty years I and my family lived big.

I was the man. I went from one employee to 25. From an annual sales volume of $25,000 to $1,000,000 I left most of the extra earnings in a business I thought would never fail But it did. So, I chased the lost money with more and more until there was nothing left. I mean nothing.

I now have $419 in my checking account. I have $19 in my savings account. My $750.00 monthly rent payment is due Aug. 1. I have a few thousand dollars more in credit card bills due within two weeks. I have $900 coming in by Aug. 15 hopefully. And, I have to eat. So, life really sucks. It seems like a bad dream that I will awaken from. But I will not. I have my health and my kids so I count my blessings. But health and kids are not enough. I want my old life and my money back.