Bruce Campbell's B-Movie Opus: The Man with the Screaming Brain

The Man With The Screaming Brain is written by, directed by, and starring Bruce Campbell. That was enough for me to buy it without watching it first- big mistake! Oy, where to begin? I've read Campbell's autobiography, If Chins Could Kill, and I found it very funny. I've also heard good things about his second book, Make Love The Bruce Cambell Way. So, we've established he can write books. He brought the same cocky sarcasm we all know and love to the books, why not the film? The Man With The Screaming Brain is bad, bad, bad... and not in a funny, B-movie, MST3K way. In a boring, why did I not save the receipt for this direct-to-video crap kind of way.

The pulp fiction-style artwork on the cover of the DVD was promising enough and it got Fangoria's seal of approval in many issues. Since I haven't learned my lesson by now by watching all the other crap Fango endorses, I bought the damn thing anyway. About fifteen minutes into the film, I was bored. Thirty minutes into the film, annoyed. By the time it was over, I was thoroughly embarassed for Mr. Campbell- and I've seen Alien Apocalypse! Let's break down the plot of this travesty and get it over with: Bruce Campbell, a wealthy industrialist, visits Bulgaria where his brain is replaced by that of a greasy cab driver's. With the cab driver's brain in his body, they seek out the woman who killed them both. Wacky hijinks should have ensued from there but no, just more crap.

I know what you're thinking: "Finally! A film made entirely in Bulgaria to fill my meaningless life!" Well, at least that's what the filmakers must assume you're thinking because the DVD is packed with extras about how this thing was made. The only thing more embarassing than this picture was finding out how hard they all worked to put it together. Apparantly, The Man With The Screaming Brain was nineteen years in the making. We should rest assured that eighteen-and-three-quarters of those years were spent begging for funding.

I'd be remiss if I didn't mention Stacy Keach as the mad scientist and Ted Raimi as his assistant. Not because they were good, but because I want their SAG cards revoked. Now. Every scene in this film that is attempting to be funny is painfully unfunny, especially the ones with Keach and Raimi. Do yourself a favor and stay far away from The Man WIth Screaming Brain because it has nothing to offer you. As my sage, introspective husband stated so wisely, "There aren't even boobs in this film to save it!"