Building Relationships by Managing Money Together

There are a variety of factors to consider when building relationships with ones significant other. We think about building trust, being more thoughtful, and considerate about taking out the trash or small surprises. One aspect that isn't so forefront in the thoughts of our culture's couples is managing money. Not only is money the root of many marital problems that could be prevented, but managing money can be a great opportunity for building relationships.

Though you may not be married, managing money-and at the very least, talking about money-is a great way to understand where you and your partner stand financially. Assuming that one day you may get married (or are already married), finances will become tricky. Be sure not to hide anything. Large sums of debt may seem embarrassing or burdensome, but it's better you get these things out in the open with you partner. Building relationships requires honesty and open communication. If you cant handle being honest about your finances now, managing money as a couple will continue to be difficult.

Managing money together also helps with building relationships because it allows you to start setting goals as a couple. This could be anything from a pact to stop spending so heavily, to setting a complete 10 year plan. Depending on the seriousness of your relationship, and how comfortable you are discussing these things it may be better to start small and work your way up. My significant other and I, for example, decided that we were going to limit our spending together at $50 per week. This includes everything from dinner together to our weekly coffee date. We've managed thus far to stay under this limit-continually reminding each other of our financial goals (which in our case is to take a vacation together at the end of the year). By pinpointing these financial goals and setting them together, managing money will be more effective-because you will hold each other accountable. Perhaps your goal is to eliminate debt, or buy a house together some day. These goals help in building relationships by strengthening future hopes for your relationship.

When managing money with your partner you need to take into consideration where you both are in life. We all agree that building relationships takes time and cooperation. This is particularly important when thinking about big life changes. Obviously the financial goals and situations will be different depending on your situation. I know that for those of us about to graduate college, there are many things to consider when managing money in a relationship. Moving for a new job, going to graduate school, having children, saving for a wedding-these are all factors you must consider when managing money as a couple. Be prepared to talk and plan these things out with your partner, and building your relationship will be easier.

Money management can be a stressful thing to tackle. Understand that like building relationships, it takes time and work. No two people are exactly in tune with each other. But when you maintain open and honest communication, cooperate, and be considerate this becomes easier to manage. In the end both your money management skills and relationship will be stronger for it. So set goals, and work toward them together-and have fun! Anything is possible.