Buying an Engagement Ring: What You Need to Know

Congratulations! Now whether you have decided to pick out a ring before you pop the question or you have already become engaged and let her choose her perfect ring, this is a big step on your way to the altar. For some this is a daunting task. The worries of what shape of ring, the perfect setting, the type of metal, and looking for the perfect diamond without bleeding your bank account dry are compounded with the thought "I hope she likes this enough to wear it for the rest of her life". The act of buying the perfect ring should not be daunting and stressful, this is a happy time that should be celebrated. A little knowledge goes a long way and can help you, whether you are buying the ring on your own or as a couple, have one less this to worry about before your big day.

Where do I start?

Now that you have decided to make the leap, you have a couple of choices. You can surprise her with a ring or you can surprise her with the question and then choose a ring together. Most will want to surprise her with the ring at dinner, at the spot of their first kiss, or some other romantic gesture without her having any idea that they have a tiny little box tucked away in their pocket. But what is going to be in the box?

After working in a Fine Jewelry department, I have seen many men come in with no idea what they are looking for. They look at the rings and nothing catches their eye. They don't know what style, what shape, how big... they just want a ring. Their intentions are good, but they are making a common mistake. They didn't research. Like I said before, a little knowledge goes a long way.

Go ahead and take a look at her jewelry. What does she wear on a daily basis? Does she like big, flashy rings with lots of stones? Does she lean towards the simple, clean styles? Does she wear jewelry at all? Take a few mental notes of what you see her wear and what she has in her jewelry box. Don't be afraid to ask her mom or her best friend what she would like. Remember, these are the people that know her best and they will more than likely be very happy to help you choose a ring that is right for her. If asking is not enough, take them along to look at rings with you. You'll be surprised to find the case you stared at that offered no possibilities of the perfect ring, now has many opportunities when you have someone with you to offer a little guidance.

Where do I go?

Now that you have a few ideas of what to look for (or you have her best friend and/or mother in tow) where would you go to look for a ring? There are a few choices, each with their own pros and cons. You can go to a department store (Sears, JCPenny's), a chain specialty jewelry store (Kays, Zales), or your local jeweler. (There are internet shopping opportunities also, but to me it seems a little shady and when making a purchase like this you may want to see the ring with your own eyes.) Go ahead and take a look at what each has to offer. Each place will differ in styles available and in price ranges.

The department store Fine Jewelry counter is a good place to start and you may find the perfect engagement ring there. Typically there is a bridal section where all the rings considered bridal are grouped together in categories- some come as a set with the wedding band, some come alone so you can purchase a wedding band at a later date. There's usually a section for solitaires and a section for the pricier rings. There is good selection of styles to choose from if you're going for a more traditional look, but if you're not looking for something everybody would have you may be disappointed by the selection.
Don't be afraid to ask the salesperson to see the ring or any questions you may have. Most of the salespeople have to go through a training course that gives them knowledge about all of the jewelry behind the counter, so they should be able to give you the answers you need. Ask about the 4 C's (which we'll cover later in the article so you know what the salesperson is saying), a diamond certificate, and a care plan for the jewelry. The care plan is important since it will cover any repairs necessary at no cost to you (except for the purchase of the plan, but in some cases it can come free) and free inspections and cleanings to maintain the ring for a lifetime. You may not think this is important and just fluff to get a little more money out of you in some cases, but repairs can add up over time- along with cleanings and setting inspections. All of which can prevent you from losing the stone, which most companies will only replace once under the plan, but it's better than putting out money for a new diamond. That can cost you more than the ring itself in some cases.
The price range at the department store are better than some places, you can usually come across a sale that will get you a ring up to half off of the ticket price. Just be weary of the quality of the stone and whether or not a certificate comes with the ring. There may be a good price for a ring there, but you do get what you pay for. A $100 diamond ring will be what it's worth in most cases, and you may be disappointed by what you see. In rare cases you'll come across a beautiful ring that's going for a price that's a steal, but don't hold your breath. On another note, not all rings will come with a certificate, which tells you everything you need to know about the ring. You may want one for appraisal and insurance reasons if you're going for a ring that's $800 or up, that way if anything were to happen to the ring, you will get the equal value back.

A specialty jewelry store or your local jeweler (someone who runs his own place without being affiliated with a chain) offers you the same a department store would and a little more. You're going to get highly trained sales associates, a larger selection of engagement rings with styles to suit everyone. At some of the smaller jewelers you may even be able to get a custom made ring if you have searched and searched and didn't find anything that was as unique as the woman you're about to marry. You'll be able to inspect the stones loose, which you wouldn't be able to do at a department store, and pick the perfect stone for whatever setting you may choose. You'll be more likely to get a diamond certificate at one of these places and a good quality of a stone along with a great care plan, but the prices are generally going to be higher. Don't let the price scare you, though. In most cases, you're going to be paying for a beautiful ring and great service after the purchase. Once you know more about diamond quality and what to look for in a diamond, you may even be able to haggle your way to a cheaper price. It never hurts to try, but you may be more lucky doing that at a local jeweler where their prices aren't set by a corporate office.

Added note for couples buying a ring together: Ladies, try on everything! Not only is it fun, but you'll find the right style for you this way. Just like clothing, it may look very pretty in the case, but you may find it's not the right shape or size for your fingers. Or it could be the ugliest ring you've ever seen, but it looks really good on your hand.

Either way, it comes down to where you feel comfortable buying the ring. Remember, not only will you be there to buy the ring, but after the fact for inspections, cleanings, and any repairs. Buy where you feel the service suited your needs the most. That seems like a common sense statement, but some people forget that.

The Ring Itself

The two most important parts of the ring are the setting and the diamond. The setting will enhance the stone while keeping it secure, and the stone will bring value to the ring. I may give a lot of information about these two factors, but once you start looking at rings all of it will come naturally to you.

Setting
The setting is the ring itself. It's the part that wraps around your finger and keeps the stone secure. These can come in a variety of styles and metals. You can get a large wrap, a tiny band, something with a little flair, a tension setting... it's almost endless. Go ahead and do a search on the internet for engagement ring settings and you'll come across a variety of styles to suit almost anyone. Remember to be practical though. A solitaire setting may be what she is looking for, but if she has a very hands on job that can cause the ring to get beat up or snagged, it's not the most practical as it is a setting that sticks out a bit from the hand. Something more flush with the finger would suit this type of woman better with less chances of getting the ring caught on anything and possibly losing the stone. Consider her activities and job when choosing a setting- the setting is what's protecting the stone.
There are a variety of metals to choose from when selecting a setting. The most popular are yellow or white gold, but it doesn't have to stop there. You can choose from sterling silver, stainless steel, tungsten, titanium or platinum. Each have their own properties that can make them suitable for different ring designs. If selecting gold, remember 14K may have more worth, but 10K is a bit more durable. Yellow gold can sometimes give a diamond a yellowish tint, and you'll see rings where the band is yellow, but the setting of the ring is in white gold. This is to diminish the yellow tint that the stone would otherwise pick up. But rings can still be found completely in yellow or white gold. Again, this is something you'll have to consider by looking at what she usually wears or looks for in jewelry.

The Diamond
I have already mentioned the 4 C's already, but this is where I'll explain them. These will help you ensure that you're getting a quality diamond regardless of what size and shape you're looking for. The 4 C's are clarity, cut, color, and carat. Clarity and color are rated on scales using letters and numbers that you will see on the certificate and on the tag. Cut and color are other factors to look at before you put your money down on a diamond. All these factors are important to determining the value of a diamond.

Cut
It is a common mistake to believe that cut refers to the shape of the diamond. What it actually refers to the way that the facets are cut in the diamond. Now, each shape has a "perfect" way that the facets should be cut . What facets do are reflect the light that enters the ring and back out to what the eye sees. The way the angles are cut are a big factor in determining the clarity of the diamond, because it can reflect lots of light and give the diamond it's 'sparkliness" which is a good cut, or it can be cut too shallow and the diamond can appear to be dead, with no fire or brilliance. If you look for a diamond with a lot of sparkle, it can help you ensure you're getting a stone with a good clarity rating.

Clarity
Most diamonds are going to have blemishes or inclusions (or both) that effect it's clarity. It's going to be hard to find a perfect diamond at a cheap price, but there are ways to come across and fantastic stone with little or no inclusions visible to the naked eye. A good cut will usually hide some of the inclusions and enhance the clarity of the stone. But you will find stones that are riddled with so many inclusions and blemishes that it appears to be cloudy. If you look for a good cut with lots of sparkles, more than likely you'll come across a decent clarity rating.
The ratings are: flawless, internally flawless, VVS1, VVS2, VS1, VS2, SI1, SI2, I1, I2, I3. Those are the highest ratings to the lowest, with flawless being the best (and probably most expensive) diamond and I3 being the worst with lots of inclusions and blemishes. Most places will carry SI1, SI2, I1, I2, and I3 rated stones. These usually have small inclusions that be seen with the naked eye, but in some cases will not interfere with the brilliance or fire (unless it's an I2 or I3). The VVS1 to the VS2 will have hardly any inclusions that will be visible to the naked eye or you'll have to use the jeweler's magnifying glass to see them. These are the higher priced of the bunch. If you stay within the SI range of diamonds, you'll still get a beautiful stone but for a price that won't give you a small panic attack.

Color
The color of a diamond is also rated on a lettered scale. But I'm going to spare you and not overload you with more letters to memorize. The color is best checked out of the setting on a plain background. You're aiming for colorless to near colorless diamond. It's going to be a clear or blu-ish white. You'll have to pay a lot of money for a colorless diamond, but near colorless or faint yellow won't empty your wallet and will still reflect light to give the stone it's desired sparkle. Just look for a very light yellow to an obvious light yellow tint or even downright cloudy- these are of lower quality and will not reflect much light. There are diamonds of different colors from a canary yellow, reds, blues, champagne, and black. These all have different scales for rating, don't let a jeweler tell you a white diamond is actually one of these though- these diamonds generally have a far higher price tag.

Carat
Carat is the weight of the stone. You can go as tiny as 1/10th of a carat to as big as you'd like. 1 carat is .2 grams (or 200 milligrams). As the weight rises, so will the value and price of the ring. Some people will say that the size does matter, but always, always, always go for quality, not quantity. This is important. You can get a 2 Carat ring, but if it's cloudy, appears dead, and poorly cut it's not going to be a very valuable ring. But a tiny stone with a nearly perfect cut, lots of brilliance and shine, and almost no color will get more value and be far more impressive than the big, ugly diamond. Carat is only one factor, and usually the most focused on factor that has led to many poor diamond choices. If Carat weight is important to you, then pick the perfect size and place the other 3 factors around it. If the place you're at doesn't have a diamond that fits into the standards you're looking for, than move to the next place. Don't compromise because the stone is big, make sure you're getting a very good stone that can last a lifetime and fulfill her sparkly fantasies.

Once all that is set and you've picked out your ring, you're going to get a certificate. Make sure the certificate is GIA(Gemological Institute of America) or AGS (American Gem Society). These certificates are everything you will need to know about the diamond. They include carat weight, clarity and color ratings, and the cut as rated by a member of one of these institutes. These are not the only institutes around that rate diamonds, but these are the most trusted. If you do decide to buy a stone that has been rated elsewhere, make sure that you can still get the credentials of the lab. The certificate will not place a value on the stone, but can help place the proper value at an appraisal. These are important since they will tell you that you are buying a real diamond. Sometimes you can get a diamond without a certificate, but the salesperson should be able to show you that it is a real diamond with a diamond tester.

So there you have it. Now calm down, this does seem like a lot of information at first, but it will help you choose the perfect ring without having to sell your beloved game console. Just enjoy choosing a ring, whether she is with you or you've dragged her mother and friend along. Take this info with you if you would like and pick the ring that you'll be confident that will make her beam when you first open that little box in front of her. Take the stress out of ring buying by using this info and make this a joyous time as it should be.

Happy hunting and Congratulations.

Sources:
The Diamond Buying Guide, 4 C's of Diamonds, thediamondbuyingguide.com

So You Wanna Buy An Engagement Ring, SoYouWanna.com