Buying a Home During the Economic Crisis:

Cautious should have been my middle name. I don't like taking risks. In fact, in my daily life I make a concerted effort to avoid them. Playing it safe is my motto. This way of thinking is reflected in my very low-risk 401K investment strategy to the fact that I have a bath tub mat. So when I finally made the decision to purchase a home, I painstakingly weighed all the options, carefully calculated the costs and made provisions for this major purchase in my budget.

I've always wanted to buy a home and Spring 2008 seemed like the perfect time for a cautious girl like me. The nation was in the midst of a buyer's market cycle. The stars were in alignment. Prices were plummeting left and right; and there was a cornucopia of homes to choose from in my price range and below. It was almost too good to be true.

After several long months of searching with my real estate agent, I was beginning to get discouraged. I thought I would never find "the one." But in late August, I finally found the home of my dreams. It was everything I'd hoped for and more. I didn't believe in love at first sight until I walked through the door of this home. In that moment I fell in love.

My agent was an excellent haggler and exceptional negotiator. After about two weeks of negotiations, the accepted offer was almost $20,000 lower than the asking price. I was in heaven! The non-risk taker careful and cautious home buyer was sailing on calm waters, not a storm in the sky, not even a cloud, just clear blue skies out ahead for miles.

Just about two weeks shy of my closing, the unexpected happened. The stock market tanked like a sinking stone into a bottomless ocean; and so did my ship of perfect plans and smooth sailing. At first I was in denial. That's the normal reaction for someone who avoids risks. You ignore the situation, pull the covers over your head, and you don't deal with the issue staring you right in the face. I'll admit this is not a particularly smart move because it only delays the inevitable.

What woke me up from my fear induced daze was Suze Orman. She was on CNN and her usually optimistic tone had vanished. Someone called in who was in the middle of purchasing a home. The woman and her husband were in negations and Suze said without hesitation, and great conviction that they should back out now. Even Jim Cramer, the host of CNBC's Mad Money and financial expert, said it was time to live simply and move in with relatives. What in the world was I suppose to do? Panic was setting in and I was in full freak out mode.

I had a hard time sleeping at night. That loud voice of fear seemed to shout at me in the stillness of night saying: You can still get out of this. Make a run for it now. It's not too late to ditch the whole thing. Are you sure you really liked that place? You could wait things out and find something better later. And what about your job? Was it really safe?

The what ifs kept playing over and over again in my head. I was terrified. I felt like a bride with a really severe case of cold feet. Did I really want to close the deal on this major purchase in the middle of the worst economic meltdown in my lifetime?

To make matters worse, the seller suddenly notified me that he needed additional time and the closing would have to be a week later. I immediately wondered if this was a sign from above to get out now. I could walk away and get my 10% down payment back. It wasn't too late to run.

But deep down, in the core of my being, I knew I couldn't walk away from the home I'd fallen in love with no matter how scared I was. My dream of becoming a homeowner was on the verge of becoming a reality. I couldn't turn back now and I didn't want to. The cautious girl who played it safe for her entire life, finally decided to take a crazy, yet thrilling leap of faith.

I have no idea what the future holds, but I do know that living in fear of what might happen paralyzed me for too long. Over thinking things, worrying and being radically cautious can hold us captive until life becomes only an existence rather than a beautiful, uncharted daily experience full of new opportunities and exciting challenges.

The day of the closing, I signed what seemed like a million sheets of paper before I was handed the keys to my new home. Getting those keys and signing that paperwork also officially marked the moment I found the courage to live life, not fear it.