Calling All Moms: How to Have the Sex Talk with Your Son

As a mother, I can identify with that feeling associated with talking to your child about sex. This may be especially true for moms who are having the sex talk with their sons. However, this may be one of the most crucial conversations that you may ever have with your child. The consequences outweigh any type of embarrassment from having this conversation. Here are a few tips that can help any mother when having the first sex talk with her son.

One of the biggest mistakes many parents may make is making too much of such a conversation. While it may be one of the most important things that you do, try to casually broach the subject. Talking to your son about girls and dating does not have to be a sit down and lay all the cards out on the table event. By "downplaying" such a talk, your son may feel more comfortable and be more willing to open up.

Avoid using "catchy" phrases. You are the mom, not a friend. Stick to using appropriate language and avoid slang, as this may lead to confusion. Although your son may not find it cool, the word condom sounds better coming from your mom than the other nicknames it may have. The same can be said of other terminology regarding sexual matters and anatomical parts.

Do not, I repeat, do not try to make this talk humorous by poking fun at your son. Not only does this lead to embarrassment but hurt feelings. Doing so will also make your son less likely to talk to you about other serious matters. You want your son to feel as though he can talk to you about anything.

Making false assumptions is a big no no. Do not assume that your child knows what you are talking about and fully understands. While this greatly depends on the age of the child, keep in mind that even older children and adolescents receive false information from peers. These things should be clarified, assuming that your son is on the same page can lead to further misinterpretation.

Never initiate the sex talk by discussing your own lifestyle. This includes conversations that start with "when I was your age" or "when I did this or that", this is an automatic deal breaker. No child, adult or not, wants to know about a parents sex life. It just seems icky!

Remember, talking to your son about these topics shouldn't be a one time occurrence. Know what's going on with your child, what they're doing, and how they feel about the subject. The most important thing that you can do is to listen to your son, not only does this build trust and understanding but can help you gain the situation from their perspective.