Calm Christmas: New Tradition for the Smart Woman!

The crowds are overwhelming and every gift on your extensive list is sold out, broken or just too expensive. Everyone wants more than you can afford and much more than they need. If you don't get just the right thing for each person they will need the receipt to exchange it for something else they can complain about and make you feel like you wasted your time standing in line for hours on end to try to bring a little joy to their season. The food needs to be purchased, cooked and served while everyone asks over and over again when dinner is going to be done. You have to remember who likes what and how everything has to be cooked for each persons likes and dislikes. If anything is wrong they will let you know for the next year what you did wrong and hope that you won't do it again. It is very important THEY are happy. They never once ask what you would like or if they can help. You haven't slept more than three hours a night for the last two weeks and every year you hate Christmas more and more.

What happened to the simple days of the past? When Christmas was fun and mom did all the work and cooked all the food. When your cousins and aunts came to visit and spent time with you playing games, talking and singing Christmas songs while mom was fixing the last of the dinner. When everyone laughed and joked about each other with the aroma of good food drifting through the house while mom set the table. When you enjoyed every wonderful bite mom served you over and over and over.

Well, guess what! Now you know why mom hated Christmas more and more with each passing year. Why she told you to cook it yourself next time and why she didn't seem to smile all that much when she opened her crummy gift after having spent hours and money on just the right thing for you. It's time to stop the continuing unpleasant tradition of feeling left out, over worked and unappreciated. There is no reason for one person in the family to feel all the stress of the season without a moment to enjoy the happiness of it. You can step back, tell your family things are going to change today and start a whole new tradition you get to enjoy as much as everyone else.

First, stop feeling like you have to do everything for everyone all the time. You only have to have a few traditions for the season to feel complete. Not every single tradition from every culture in the world! Sit everyone down and start with the menu. Is turkey the main dish? Great! Most local grocery stores will now fix the entire meal for a set cost. All you have to do is pick it up and put it on the table. If you look closely at what you spend to gather everything, the money spent on gas for the car to go to and from the store several times to buy it all and the time it takes to find and fix it, it is cheaper in the long run to order it ready made. There will be minimum work to prepare it for placement on the table. Delegate the setting of the table to someone else in the family while you relax for a few minutes with your guest.

Next are the gifts. This is not as hard to solve as you may think. Tell each member of the family they will receive three gifts from a Christmas list which they are going to make and have complete by December 1^st! Set a price limit per person. Any other gifts they receive will be surprises. They will receive six gifts in all. There will be no complaining about what is received. On the list must be exactly what is wanted, color, sizes and where to find them. If the gift is gone by the time you get to it then they get whatever YOU decide they will have. Do not forget to give them your list for Christmas too. Make it very clear what you would like and what you would NOT like. You do NOT want another cleaning product of the latest craze or any books on how to lose weight, cook better or look younger. You want beautiful clothes, jewelry, perfume, bath powders or romance novels! As their one and only mother you deserve to have something fun, loving and wonderful on Christmas morning too.

Hire a personal shopper! It can be your own children, a neighbor looking to earn a little extra cash or a college student. There are professional shoppers listed in each city that love to shop for a low fee. Aside from all that shop on line! It is the easier way to do all your shopping early and not even deal with the crowds. Virtually every major store or service can now be found on line with the same low prices and sales you find in the over crowded malls all across this great country. There are unique gift buying opportunities as well as local craftsmen to choose from. If you like to shop then by all means have at it! You have more time to enjoy it now that dinner is ordered from the grocery store.

While you are out shopping plan a lunch with friends somewhere fun and have a great day together. Sample every coffee in the store or play games at the arcade like you did when you were a kid. Plan a romantic lunch or dinner with your husband. Dress up and enjoy the time alone with him before everyone shows up to be fed and pampered. This gives you a chance to connect to each other again in a very personal way. Plan a day alone and go to the spa, get a massage and read. Make everyone go shopping at once so you are alone in the house and take a nap for an hour in a semi dark room with soft music in the background. In other words take some time for yourself. Plan to relax and buy yourself the gift you know they won't. It's OK to pamper the person who does the most work for the family at this time of year. You deserve it more than anyone.

Now the house. Hire a house keeper to come in and do the heavy cleaning a week before Christmas. It is a one time cleaning and leaves only the lighter cleaning with a little time left over to watch a Christmas movie. Assign good old fashion chores to everyone in the family and don't be the sad holiday slave. It's no fun for you and it's no fun to them when you can't smile on Christmas morning. Give each person a room to clean and you check on their progress and give suggestions. Do not do their work for them!

So your calm Christmas is complete. Food has been ordered, cleaning hired out, gifts purchased and plans laid out. It's time to take a long hot bath and enjoy a glass of your favorite wine before your company arrives. Give everyone their last minute jobs and you disappear to the tub for an hour. When everyone arrives they'll wonder how it did it all and still look so beautiful. Tell them it's because you are starting a new Christmas tradition for smart women everywhere. Merry Christmas and have fun, fun, fun!