Can You Be the Biggest Loser in Your Life?

I sat here tonight watching the first episode of the new season of The Biggest Loser. When the show originally began airing I thought, "How stupid! Like I want to sit around watching a bunch of fat people! I can find that in the mirror, or at any family reunion I might attend! Shah!" I avoided the show for the first three seasons, and then, in come syndication! This summer while channel surfing I ran across a rerun marathon and lo and behold by the end of that first episode I was hooked!

For three months now I've anxiously awaited the new season. Tonight when it aired, twenty four minutes in, I had bawled my eyes out three times already. Alright! Be like my physically fit, Adonis of a husband, and laugh at me. I'm okay with it, and I figure I'll be crying again next week as well!

"Why, Krissy, would you be crying one episode in, with characters/people you haven't even watched enough to form an attachment to?" Although the answer is perhaps complex for you, it's quite simple to my mind.

I am every member, man or woman, of each team. No, I don't weigh 400 pounds, or 300 or even 250, but I am considered morbidly obese. If the words morbidly obese aren't the greatest ego crushers in the history of the English language, then I don't know what is! Today I am 70 pounds overweight. At 5'1" that equates to all of me being in a wad! So, maybe I don't have as far to go as the contestants on the show, but I do have a mountain of my own to climb, and I can relate.

I am the girl finishing thirty minutes behind everyone else. I am the last chosen to the team, the first voted off, and the ones not chosen at all. I am shy, opting to blend into the wallpaper, often forgetful that you can never hide a bright red barn in a field of green!

I'm the mom who dreads Friday night football games because of the sound I make as I tromp up the bleachers. I'm the mom who doesn't eat Thanksgiving dinner with her boys at school because she doesn't want everyone staring at her as she waddles through the lunch line. I am the woman who still smokes, in a desperate attempt, to detract from her size and draw your attention up towards her face and eyes. I am the mother of children who have never been to Six Flags because their mom can't hold up to walk around the park all day. And I'm also the mother of boys who know that she is the reason that they don't get to experience not only this but many other everyday things that all their friends take for granted. If that isn't humiliation for your psyche, again, I don't know what is.

This summer, after being inspired by The Biggest Loser, I began making some very positive changes in my life, and although I've slipped a bit since my wreck, for the first time in as far back as I can remember, I believe in me and have confidence that I will win this war against a lifetime of bad health choices. I'm the only one who has any power to make a difference and I refuse to spend the rest of my life hiding in the shadows. Perhaps this excess baggage I tote around doesn't know it, but I've got this thing beat already, simply because I've made up my mind this is how it'll be, and won't settle for anything less than a victory of my own.

No, I won't be winning a gazillion dollars, but then again you can't place a price tag on the prize I'll be taking to the bank. I will be winning back my life. With every pound shed I am gaining back my health, and ensuring a longer, more befitting tomorrow. Not only am I bettering me, but also my children. I owe this victory not only to myself, but every much as much, to them, as well.

Now if I just had my very own, personal, Jillian Michaels to kick my butt in gear on a daily basis! lol

How about you? Have you made up your mind yet to be The Biggest Loser in your life? Do you agree that it's your choice and that no one else can do it for you? That, right there, is the part that has taken me nearly twenty years to come to terms with. How long will it be before you accept it as your truth as well?

No more shadows!!!!