Can Christ and Kink Co-exist ?

This commentary is not going to flow out of me with ease. Things rarely flow out of me with ease; even those things that you can say in polite company. I do not have answers for many things and have learned in my middle years that accepting that there is not an answer for everything, even things part of our personal life and ethic. It seems on some level we should hold all the answers for the things we embrace in our personal life, but alas for me it is not true.

I cannot justify many things in my life in a manner I would be contented to. I once wrote about being a submissive /slave and an active Christian. Truth is at the end of the day, I have spent more time enthralled with a lifestyle than with a faith this is my own personal sin and not matter of the BDSM communities concern.

Many I know try to justify the two. The leather world provides endless opportunities for nifty and neat Christology's.

The leather world has more than its share of practicing Mormons, good Catholics, and supposedly spirit filled Pentecostals. All of them come with the added fear of being caught in the leather community. It is only the high degree of ethical behavior of those members of the community that do not hide their lifestyle; that allow the world of Christ to coexist with the world of kink for many of these folks. What goes on at BDSM gatherings is a sacred secret kept and not shared with the world. The BDSM community exists and thrives only in an environment of impeccable personal ethics on the part of those involved. This includes respecting folks of faith and their right to privacy.

I like to compare the BDSM lifestyle to evangelical Christianity. Evangelicals have that all important relationship with God the Daddy. Kinky submissive women have that all important relationship their Daddy Dominants or at least they hope too. The Dominants write the contracts catering enough to our kink to get us to stay and being well charming enough to transform us ( make a good slave out of a run of the mill submissive) to suit their purpose.

I suppose the Evangelical Daddy God does the same thing. He sets those good Christian submissive through the fire of the difficulties of life to refine them into fine Christian slaves to the Daddy God transforming them into what He would have them be. In the end that contract they entered with Daddy God when they wept the sinner's prayer defines the whole relationship. Just like the contract with my Master defines the whole relationship.

Yes, there is all that emotional stuff, and sometimes it leads both the submissive and evangelical Christian to rewrite the whole contract. Now of course I say a great deal of this in somewhat sacrilegious jest because it is the emotionalism and the release of endorphins that drive both the evangelical Christian and the slave/submissive to their Daddy god.

BDSM is not all about two people coming together to satisfy complimentary fetishes. Real friendships and romantic entanglements happen. In these all in the BDSM community are held to hand by the higher ethic or moral structure that defines their spiritual life. If your Dominant becomes ill and cannot live up to his end of the contract does his submissive leave him in his time of need? Some do; for by the rules of the community the terms of the relationship are that one is free to leave at anytime. Slavery is chosen as is the responsibility of ownership.

Faith matters; as most submissive/slaves have a 'real' affection towards their Master that on a practical level will call them to stay and show love towards their Master even if their needs are not met. The reverse is true most Masters will care for a slave till they find an acceptable situation. Personal disagreements break relationships like in all relationships; but if true affection is there it is there in the end as well. We as Christians in the BDSM community embrace the common values of respect, love, and generosity. We do so to honor Christ in us as we would and do in the Church.

I really believe that true Christianity is a walk that starts at baptism and ends with extreme unction. It is our ultimate choice at the end of the day to put our effort to following Christ with in mother Church. It is about our personal relationship with God's Church and our honoring the sacraments. It is far too sacred to be compared to pleasure seeking activities like BDSM relationships or even playing golf. All of us get that endorphin rush from different things or multiple things. It is only God who can give us ultimate joy and he meets us in the lowliest of places. Yes, you can find and see God in the kinky community. The truth is that at the end of the day the Church is about Christ and the leather community about pleasure seeking within a wonderful ethic that keeps it all safe, consensual and sane.

Is it right for two life styles of Christian practice and non standard sexual practice to coexist? I have no idea. I suspect that since everything that brings us pleasure risks becoming an idol or an addiction the answer is different for each person. I hope in my life that God grants me the grace to follow Him where he wants me to be, not just where I want to go. Does this mean I throw my collar back in my Master's face? No, just that I know at the end of the day Christ is my ultimate Master. See a corny Christology in the end; I suppose I just can't help myself.